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Woman Gets Free Weed From Sonic, Proceeds To Bitch About It

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Talk about a happy meal. The Frederick News Post reported that Carla McFarland was inadvertently given a bag of weed with her chicken finger meal at a Maryland Sonic, where she had taken her 6-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son for lunch. As I’m writing this, I’m guessing the waiting time for a hot dog and a cherry slush at all Sonics just shot up two hours. This is either the stupidest dealer in the world or the greatest marketing ploy ever.

McFarland found the pot as she passed back some fries to her kids, and, of course, she claimed to be appalled. Because who likes free things? The resale value of the weed alone would have been enough to buy banana splits for a week! Ever hear of resale value, Carla?

From Frederick News Post:

“I just kind of sat there in my car in shock,” McFarland said Thursday. “I kept thinking, what if my kids had eaten it?”

If the kids had eaten it, they probably would have gotten more nutritional value from the weed than from anything you’d eat at Sonic. A five-piece chicken fingers and fries meal has almost 700 calories and 22 grams of fat. I’m not constituting that children who are six and eight should eat weed, but if they had, it probably wouldn’t have caused too much harm–well, other than a sudden craving for more Sonic, brah. Maybe they start asking, “Why is the sky blue? Is this real life? Are we just living in the eye of a blue-eyed giant named Macumba? Whoa–my hands are, like, totally bigger than my face.” There would probably be some incessant laughter, too.

Honestly, I’m surprised this woman wasn’t stoned to begin with. I can’t think of anyone who has gone to that drive-in and ordered a Super Sonic Double Bacon Cheeseburger who wasn’t under the influence. So, the next time you’re at a Sonic, order a number two and the McFarland special. You’ll be really glad you did.

[via Frederick News Post]

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Jordan Gershowitz

Jordan is a writer living in a small yet overpriced apartment in NYC. He can always be found in his favorite pair of topsiders, even though he doesn't own a yacht (yet). He may not always be right, but he's never wrong and he also knows that finishing an entire book doesn't prove anything. He could eat cereal for every meal, but doesn't...because you know...carbs. For angry tweets about the state of IU basketball follow him @jordangersh

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