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Every school has its place in this world. Some are top tier academic bastions, while others are no more than degree mills built to withstand ragers filled with enough illegal substances to instill terror in even the most hardened criminals.
Forbes released its “Top Colleges 2014” rankings, and the results may surprise you.
The top 10 is comprised of the usual suspects with a few academically overachieving schools you’ve never heard of thrown into the mix. Stanford comes in strong with a second place finish, while the United States Military Academy takes home the ninth place prize–not a terrible finish at all.
After the top 10, the list delves into a compilation of the most obscure nerd colleges in the nation, so we’re going to skip that part and hit up some of our country’s biggest rivalries instead.
Starting with the ever-competitive state of Texas, home of TFM, Rice and the University of Texas shit on the competition, but Tech was unable to even crack the top 400.
As we move over to Alabama, home of the infamous Iron Bowl rivalry, you may be surprised to see the state didn’t have a school sniff the top 200. Okay, maybe it’s not that surprising, but while Auburn and Alabama fight over trivial bullshit, the tiny school of Samford University in Birmingham quietly overtakes them in the rankings. Ultimately, however, Auburn still dominates Bama.
As we continue to head east, we’ll find that the situation in Florida isn’t much different than Texas, as the University of Florida curb stomped their in-state rivals.
Side note: What the fuck is New College of Florida?
Next, we’re going to hit up the state of Mississippi. Sadly, no one is really a winner here, as it fails to have a school escape the mid-300s. However, if you consider being 359 over 365 a victory, then by all means, fucking celebrate.
Finally, let’s check out everybody’s favorite party schools and the home of the hottest girls in the country, the University of Arizona and Arizona State.
To see where your school checks out, you can view the entire list HERE.
Image via Stanford