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Feel free to go with the opposite of these picks, but I’m about to go on a Forrest Gump type run.
Colorado vs. Michigan
Line: Michigan -20
Prop: Colorado UNDER 17.5 total points.
The Wolverines have covered seven of their last nine at home, and have held out-of-conference opponents to an average of nine points per game during the Harbaugh tenure. I simply cannot comprehend this spread. Colorado has been absolutely abysmal throughout Coach MacIntyre’s time in Boulder, warming his seat to the point of near incineration. Yet after being the vaunted Idaho State Bengals and the worst Colorado State team in recent memory, all of a sudden the Buffs are feeling confident enough to troll Harbaugh with fake depth charts and general foolishness.
With Michigan’s biggest question mark seemingly answered under center with the emergence of Wilton Speight, and the defense living up to the preseason billing, I wouldn’t want to poke the booger-eating bear that is Coach Harbaugh at home.
Pick: Michigan 55 Colorado 13
Florida State vs. Louisville
Line: FSU -3
Bobby Petrino has got it rolling again in his second stint as Louisville’s head man, thanks, of course, to his continued abstention from the use of motorcycles. Lamar Jackson, somehow just a sophomore and an immense recruiting miss for all of the schools in his home state of Florida, is a dynamic playmaker possessing elite arm talent and legitimate 4.4 speed. In other words, he’s a huge fucking problem for FSU Defensive Coordinator Charles Kelly, especially with the likely loss of star defender Derwin James.
But, though I do not doubt this will evolve into a shootout harkening back to the glory days of the original Big East when Petrino was at Louisville the first time, the Cardinals simply cannot stop anybody. FSU, with their dominant offensive line, perhaps the nation’s best running in back Dalvin Cook, and an experienced defense will overwhelm the young Cardinals late.
Florida State will start ten players on Saturday that were ranked in the top 100 of their respective recruiting classes. Louisville will start zero. Give me Jimbo Fisher and the talent advantage every time.
Pick: FSU 49 Louisville 34
Miami vs. App State
Line: Miami -3.5
Pick: Miami (buy the hook to 3)
App State burned me week one by nearly solidifying Butch Jones’ status as the worst in-game coach in all of football. But, though they did not cover, the Volunteers fortuitously live to fail another day, as the Mountaineers continue their bizarre early season tour of the mighty programs of the 1990s. Now, in an even more peculiar move, the Miami Hurricanes will travel to wherever the fuck Boone, North Carolina is to take on the newly-minted Division I giant killers.
Say what you will about Mark Richt at Georgia. He struggled to win the big games and squandered supremely talented teams with Outback Bowl appearances and late-season meltdowns. I get it. But one thing Mark Richt does not do is lose terrible out-of-conference matchups, winning games against unranked non-SEC opponents at over a ninety percent clip throughout his tenure. The Hurricanes have star QB Brad Kaaya rolling and a dominant run game, and possess more talent on their bench than the Mountaineers’ starting lineup.
App State is tough and well-coached, but Miami pulls away late.
Pick: Miami 31 App State: 17
Ohio State vs. Oklahoma
Line: OSU -3
I bet for value. This may seem hard to believe after last week’s NFL debacle, but it remains my strategy. Before the season, Oklahoma was a 7.5 point favorite at home against Ohio State. Two wholly uneventful Buckeye victories and a Sooner loss to a top 5-caliber Houston has moved the line 10.5 points? I just don’t see it. Oklahoma has a dynamic offense with a legitimate Heisman contender signal caller in Baker Mayfield. Bob Stoops, once given the now ironic moniker “Big Game Bob,” needs to get his head out of his ass and play to the strengths of his team instead of continuing this moderately successful Baylor run-and-gun impersonation that saw the Houston Cougars defense look like world beaters in week one.
The Sooners will find their groove with a heavy dose of Samaje Perine, play action passes, and a varied-tempo offense that will have the Buckeyes, one of the least experienced team in the nation, on their heels. Do not underestimate the importance of this being Ohio State’s first road game. In the 2016 NFL Draft, the Buckeyes lost 11 players in the first 100 overall picks, replacing 14 multiple-year starters in total. With that in mind, the Buckeyes combined for fewer total starts than any other Big Ten team, and will experience their first road game in what should be a raucous Norman, Oklahoma.
Pick: Oklahoma 37 OSU 31
It’s a huge weekend of college football, so I will have four more locks tomorrow..
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