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Warren Buffet Joins Twitter, Starts Pulling Power Moves

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It seems everyone has a Twitter these days. The Pope, The President, that really grumpy cat that only people experiencing crushing loneliness actually give a shit about, they all have them, even my parents have accounts, which is awful. They subtweet sex stuff. I’M 21 MOM I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING!

Today, Warren Buffet entered the fray, probably doubling the average income of the Twitter users simply by joining. I assume his account will be an absolute must follow. The man is capable of buying and selling large parts of some of the world’s smaller nations, he definitely has to have some wisdom to share with all of us budding industrial titans…and dick joke writers. For example, where can I put my money besides a checking or savings account? A mattress? Is that still a thing?

His entry into the twitterverse was not subtle. His first tweet was just the kind of 140 character power move you would expect from someone who could wipe his ass every day for several lifetimes with $1000 dollar bills and not actually run out of money, forceful and commanding.

As of posting this he has nearly 300,000 followers, and he’s following no one. Power. Move. Jesus didn’t gain followers that fast. He not only knows business, it seems, but social media as well. He followed up his first tweet with an link to an essay on the importance of women to American industry.

Keep an eye on this one, boys. He’s got 60 years on us and more money than basically all of us will make in our lifetimes. Plus, I’m just really hoping for a Buffet/Pope twitter war.

[via Reuters]


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Scientist, internet comedian, future supervillain. I still refuse to believe I've graduated college.

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