Wake Forest Student Verbally DESTROYS Cop, Full Exchange Documented In Unreal Police Report

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If this exchange between a Wake Forest University student and a campus police officer had been video recorded instead of merely transcribed, there’s a good chance that this name-redacted WFU student would’ve become the new UCONN mac and cheese kid. Sadly, it was not. But at least we have the police report.


Kudos to the officer for continuing to write down each and every insult as they came flying out of the student’s mouth. That must’ve taken some intense focus. I’d be too busy texting my mommy asking her what to do when the mean boy makes me feel brain boo boos to have the presence of mind to document this guy’s verbal barrage. Not this guy, though. He’s campus PD. He’s heard it all. Whether it be his dad constantly asking him when he’s finally gonna catch some “real criminals” or his kids being so embarrassed of his line of work that they opt to have Mom tag along for “Bring Your Parent To School Day” to talk about her job even though she’s a housewife, he’s prepared for these kinds of insults. Good man.

In all seriousness, this kid’s a fucking tool. The cop just intervened to make sure he didn’t cause any extra trouble and Douchey McGee went full scorched earth on him. This guy seems like a pretty chill dude too, as far as cops go. Go easy on him next time, Tiger.

This was definitely the most brutal insult:

Mr. (name redacted) also advised me that he was going to sue the fuck out of me and that I was a fat police officer and that I was fucked. Mr. (name redacted) also advised me that I was a fat fuck and was going to die early. Mr. (name redacted) referred to me as a faggot on numerous occasions. Mr. (name redacted) stated that he regretted saying those things to me but moments later started call [sic] me fat again.

“You’re so fucked, you fat faggot. Have fun having your kids attend your funeral! Sorry, man. I didn’t mean it. Just kidding, fatty!!!”

Ouch. Low blow, asshole.

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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