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If you’re like me, and I assume that you are if you’re reading TFM, then you probably watch NASCAR races to 1) See a wreck, 2) Have an excuse, like I really need one, to get excessively drunk, 3) Hope a fight breaks out or 4) See a wreck.
Well, we were given a treat by the racing gods late Saturday night. Those of you that were already half in the bag might have missed the melee that occurred in the NASCAR Camping World Truck Series race at Gateway Motorsports Park. Drivers John Wes Townley and Spencer Gallagher were involved in a wreck, nice, that led to the two coming to blows, very nice.
The best part about this fight was that no one tried to break it up. Unlike all the other major sports, there was no referee or teammate to step in before things got out of hand. No, this is NASCAR, where men settle their beef the way men are supposed to. You’re welcome for the new slogan, NASCAR.
Even the announcers were giddy at the notion of a scuffle breaking out. You could hear the excitement level in their voices change after hours of giving play by play of cars driving in a circle; this was the much-needed break from the race they needed to receive a second wind.
After roughly a minute of these two finely conditioned athletes going at it on the dance floor, it became clear their engines were out of gas, pun intended. Then, and only then, did race officials wrap up each driver so that they could save face and look as if they would have continued if someone hadn’t stepped in. It was a vintage “hold me back” move.
If NASCAR is going to allow fighting, which I couldn’t be more behind, then fully embrace it. At the conclusion of a fight, go ahead and start waving that checkered flag. The winner should then be escorted to victory lane with a trophy girl on each arm as he poses for photos and receives a kiss on each cheek.
Driving fast cars, kicking ass, and taking home the girl; that’s what being a red-blooded American male is about..