As a born, bred and educated Missouri Tiger, it is my duty to hate the Kansas Jayhawks, no matter what conference in which the Tigers or Jayhawks play. That said, I come to you as objectively as I can with this. The “KU Boobs” Twitter account has gained a ton of groundspeed on the internet in the last year, gaining over 50,000 followers, and no matter my hatred for the Jayhawks and all of their idiot fans – sorry, I will try to keep it objective – I love a good set of sweater puppies busting out of a shirt. On Monday night, the @KUBoobs twitter account tweeted that they had been sent a cease and desist order from the Kansas athletic department.
KU Boobs has been ordered to cease and desist by The University of Kansas by June 12, 2013.
— KU Boobs (@KUboobs) June 11, 2013
Apparently, the issue came down to wristbands that the KU Boobs website was selling. Kansas wasn’t too happy about some Twitter account selling knock-off Livestrong wrist bands to pay the bills. Shame on you!
The fun police are always on patrol in Lawrence. This comes just a few years after the KU athletic department’s spats with both Anheuser-Busch and a local college t-shirt shop, Joe College.
Let’s start with the beer cans. In 2009, Bud Light came out with college-themed cans that were sold in college towns all across the country. The cans featured school colors, but never used names or logos of universities. The Kansas athletic department objected, claiming that the cans promoted underage drinking. Whatever. College promotes underage drinking. You let a bunch of 18 year olds live without their parents for Christ’s sake. Let it go. The cans got banned, but the joke is on Kansas because BUD LIGHT’S COLORS ARE RED AND BLUE. Choose your battles. Or perhaps it was because KU’s football team was so shitty in 2009 that they were just mad or something.
Now onto perhaps the most egregious of Kansas’s ridiculous legal exploits. A popular Lawrence T-shirt shop, Joe College, that became famous for their ‘Muck Fizzou’ (cute) and ‘Frank Martin Mows My Lawn’ (racist) shirts in the 90s and early 2000s were given a cease and desist order from the KU athletic department for allegedly using the university’s name and likeness to turn a profit. Bunch of fun haters, man. They’re college kids. Let them have fun.
So now Kansas has seen fit to take away sweet, sweet titties from their students after taking away beer and funny t-shirts. Be a worse state, Kansas. Really. You guys have produced the likes of the Westboro Baptist Church and now your athletic department has scored a hat trick of college fun-ruining. You take away beer, t-shirts, and boobies from the college experience and what do you have left? Education and free pizza parties. Fuck that.
I’m hoping for huge NCAA violations to be laid on the KU athletic department, for reasons other than personal, just to see these hypocrites go down in flames. Who gives a flying rock chalk about whether or not someone is turning a small profit from your large success? Let the kids have fun.
I may hate Kansas with every fiber of my being, but I love me a good pair of boobies. Don’t take that away from me or anyone else, no matter what flag they fly.