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Throwback Thursday: Ms. South Carolina Draws a Blank, Plays It Anyway

In 2007 during the Miss Teen USA pageant, Ms. South Carolina- Caitlin Upton, dropped an epic bomb. Women across the country were forced to retreat to their kitchens.

Question: “Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can’t locate the U.S. on a world map. Why do you think this is?”

Answer: “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some…people out there in our nation don’t have maps, and uh, I believe that our, uh, education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and, I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future…for our children.”

First of all, check out Slater’s face. This went exactly as planned. His shit-eating grin says: “Fuck yes, 50 million people are going to watch this on YouTube. Thank you sexy airhead.” I’ll give her this: it’s kind of a stacked question. It’s not like she could answer: “Well I don’t know where I am right now. I don’t see pots and pans, or a stove. I’m not even sure what the U.S. is. But, I’m smokin’ hot and DTF.” Actually, that probably would’ve worked.

This is America, goddammit. It’s downright unacceptable to not know where we are on a fucking map. However, I’m completely ok with this smokeshow not knowing where “the Iraq” or “the Asian countries” can be found.

“Miss South Carolina, come on and raise up. Now take your shirt off.”

 

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