======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
These colleges-by-state graphics come out seemingly every week. “The Hardest Partying Colleges In Each State.” “The Colleges With The Most Underwhelming Alumni In Each State.” “The Colleges With The Lowest Median Meth Prices In Each State.” Most of them are pretty easy to predict; for example, West Virginia University is tops not just in West Virginia, but in all of America when it comes to raging balls, lacking notable alumni, and discount crank, so obviously they’re going to be West Virginia’s representative institution on all three such charts. No surprises there.
But some of these graphics are oddly specific enough to lend themselves to having states represented by obscure institutions the likes of which you’ve never heard of. Exhibit A:
I’ve written for TFM since 2012, and have worked full-time here writing college stories for college students for over 1.5 years. Even so, I have absolutely no clue what some of these colleges are. Whitman College in Washington? Sterling College in Nebraska? University of Jamestown in… err… whatever state is above South Dakota? The fuck are those, schools in the division below DeVry’s athletic conference? Those sound like the type of generic, stock school names you could easily convince me were the setting of Pitch Perfect or were listed on George O’Leary’s resume.
Don’t even get me started on whatever the fuck colleges represent Maine and Arkansas. I appreciate that Business Insider thinks I’m smart enough to know what these colleges are simply by seeing smidgens of their logos, but I wouldn’t even know what they were if they’d given me the university’s full name, a link to their Wikipedia page, and four year’s tuition — and I don’t even care. I prefer just making them up.
Have fun trying to get into Bronco Mountain University, West Virginians. I hear it’s a real toughie..
Image via Shutterstock