There are lots of different ways to haze, from the funny to the fucked up. I was always a fan of the former, mostly because I have a sick and twisted sense of humor and am an expert at embarrassing people. Just ask the pledge I named “Jizz Blizzard.” God did that ever stick. You could also take for example how this job embarrasses my family. They tell me not to visit home and explain to my relatives that I’m doing charity work in a third world country. In fact, considering the recent “gone but never forgotten” posts on my Facebook wall I think they may have just told people that I died. (*Holds back angry tears*) Whatever, I’m TFTC.
The Tampa Bay Rays, as it turns out, are excellent hazers. It’s well known that Rays manager Joe Maddon has a pretty quirky sense of humor, and clearly that has rubbed off on his players. This year the Rays “upperclassmen” had the rookies perform Carly Rae Jepsen’s all time number one classic single “Call Me Maybe.” In leotards. In front of the Green Monster at Fenway Park. Thankfully they filmed it. Pledge trainers and cleat chasers alike, enjoy the Tampa Bay Rays’ sexually charged rendition of “Call Me Maybe.”