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Greek life is coming back to Texas State University, but with some major caveats. In the fall, we reported that Texas State would be suspending all Greek activities after the tragic death of a Phi Kappa Psi pledge. It was the second time in less than a year that a student had died in San Marcos from activities related to Greek life.
It now appears that after some serious overhauls, Texas State is giving Greeks a second chance. In an email obtained from a TFM tipster, we have learned of the heavily regulated guidelines that students will face upon reinstatement.
While we were given access to the full terms, our tipster was nice enough to briefly summarize each section of the lengthy list of rules, and quite frankly I liked their summary better.
Key Component 1: Introduction to Greek Life and Recruitment
– Basically all chapters have to attend a “phired up IVaIU” program whatever the fuck that is before recruitment to ‘educate’ members. For IFC specifically, a PNM orientation will be offered 3 times throughout the semester and PNM’s must attend one. All PNM’s also must have a 2.7 gpa.
Having to attend an orientation before even getting an opportunity to rush? That’s annoying. Also is that 2.7 cumulative or just in my intended major? Because I got obliterated by geology freshman year (stupid rocks), but I’ll fuck up a marketing class. You’re telling me that not knowing the difference between marble and slate would have prevented me from rushing?
Key Component 2: New Member Education
– Each chapter has to submit their NME plan to the Greek Affairs office for approval. IFC will require all chapters to utilize no more than four weeks for a new member period. The chapters will work with nationals to create a detailed plan to be submitted for approval by the Greek Affairs office PRIOR to being able to begin recruiting.
Let the oversight begin. Not only do New Member Educators have to submit their detailed plans, but they also have to get them in BEFORE even attempting to recruit (so that they can be reviewed by some elderly gentleman with a magnifying glass, I assume).
Okay, but once rushing is over we can all have some bawdy, unmonitored, fun — right? Wrong.
Key Component 3: Risk Reduction Events, Monitoring, and Training
– At least 75% of each chapters members must attend a training session prior to any social event, date function, or tailgate.
-No social events until September 1st, 2018 …unless you were already on social probation then you can’t have any until that gets lifted.
-Beginning 2018-19, social events will be based on chapter gpa from the previous semester.
-2.7+ can hold 4 social events with or without alcohol.
-2.5-2.69 can hold 3 events, only 2 may have alcohol.
-2.25-2.49 can have 2 events, only 1 with alcohol.
-2.4 – no events
-All events must be within 100 mile radius of San Marcos ( RIP to formals in NOLA, South Padre, and Colorado </3).
-No hard liquor allowed in fraternity houses, and under 15% alcohol drinks allowed only in the private living quarters of members of legal drinking age.
-Social events must have a tabc alcohol provider and Texas State University Police Department approved security present from start to finish of the event.
-Chapters must agree to the new Texas State tailgate policies in order to tailgate (which totally suck).
That sick formal spot your chapter has been frequenting for years? Not anymore. Getting liquored up inside the house? Not if anyone is watching. The best you can do is enjoy a warm case of Natty stashed in your 10×10 closet of a room. Or if you’re feeling extra wild, go ahead and get yourself a Four Loko to the tune of 12 percent, you dirty dog, you. Oh, and socials will now have the same level of security as a presidential motorcade. And if all that wasn’t enough, there wil be training sessions before EVERY event, including tailgates, which apparently will also suck now.
Key Component 4: Chapter Advisors
– Basically you have to have chapter advisors and alums living within 60 miles and the advisors must attend 4 roundtables a year.
Chapter advisors that actually advise on things? No thanks.
Key Component 5: Chapter Advancement and Awards
– They are making chapter report cards. Like literally, a report card — and you have to have a ‘passing score’ to remain an active chapter.
Maybe I’m an asshole but this part really made me laugh. Just take a moment and really think about it. What kind of grade would your chapter get if this happened at your school? Call me a cynic, but I would imagine that a majority of you would be pretty on edge if these were your rules.
I used to photoshop my report card every semester before showing my parents. Unfortunately, I don’t think that same method would be as successful in this scenario.
Key Component 6: Leadership Development
– 75% of members must attend a leadership training to include hazing prevention
I’m sure this will be effective. Hazing seminars for Greeks work on the same level as I imagine a “don’t pay kids hundreds of thousands of dollars under the table” seminar would go over for college basketball coaches. Yeah, we’ll show up, and we might even pretend to listen, but at the end of the day, we’re still going to do what we want to do. Your little seminar isn’t going to change the way we have always operated, good sir.
Key Components 7&8:
– Basically to be reinstated the chapter president must go into the Greek Affairs office and agree to comply, and then each individual member must also agree.
Any rights that you think you may have had before are now gone. Sign on the dotted line, please.
Look, I get it. These rules are going to put one hell of a damper on Greek life at Texas State, but so does a system that allows students to lose their lives. All those crazy stories that TFM’s founders have from their days stomping around San Marcos are going to greatly differ from that of future Bobcats, but that’s just the way it is.
Let this be a warning to all you other schools out there who still have a chance to salvage your existence. Take care of your shit, and protect each other. Because if you don’t, reforms will follow and change the Greek experience at your school for generations to come. Tradition matters. Don’t fuck it up for everyone else..
Image via Wikimedia Commons