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VIDEO: SJW College Student Rants About How All Science Must Die Then Proceeds To Use Smartphone

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I learned a couple new things today: that “fallism” exists, and that it is my new favorite least favorite PC phenomenon.

I can’t find too much literature on this budding movement (which definitely doesn’t say anything about its legitimacy), but from what I can gather, a fallist wants some overarching theme of modern society to fall; for us to do away with it and just start completely over.

“Okay,” you’re probably thinking. “I can get behind this. What are we talking here? Hoverboard usage? The two party system? Gatorade’s decision to abolish their Midnight Thunder flavor (Author’s note: Apparently “Midnight Thunder,” while being the greatest Gatorade flavor of all time, is also the title of an erotic novel described by the synopsis “… Lexi isn’t the girl she used to be, and she’s determined to have the hot cowboy in her bed only if she keeps him out of her heart.”)?”

Well, how about science, friend? If one fallist college student from South Africa has her way, we’d say sayonara to all science and allow for every individual culture to start over on the subject so that they themselves can discover every aspect of science in a way that “is produced by” and “speaks to” members of that specific culture, despite the fact that, y’know, we already know the answer to all the shit they want to do away with and then rediscover. Watch her bizarre rant, and make note of the end, when she pulls out her smartphone:

This student’s reasoning behind why she wants science to fall is the most sound part of her argument: she’s a decolonialist, which means she denounces the effects colonization — South Africa’s, in this case — has had on indigenous peoples, their land, and their identity. Fair enough; human decency always has us side with the oppressed, and it is tragic that so much culture was destroyed during the stages of imperialism. Her argument, however, is so laughable that I’m going to take a few seconds to laugh at it before I go into any more detail.

Ha! Ha ha! Haaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Like I stated earlier, this student’s idea is for individual cultures to forget all scientific facts they know that weren’t discovered by them so that they can discover them themselves. That’s like a chef tasting another chef’s signature dish then advocating for all restaurants to start completely over on their menus so that he can go ahead and claim it was his recipe all along. The idea that facts must be discovered by you is so laughably backwards, isolationist, and plagiarist. Facts aren’t subjective by definition; Deal with it.

“Western modernity is the direct antagonistic factor to decolonization because Western knowledge is totalizing.” Uh, isn’t all scientific knowledge totalizing? Generally speaking, if a pre-colonial African made a landmark scientific discovery, there’s a good chance they were been credited with it by Western civilization — Western civilization attributes a vast number of math, astronomy, architecture, medicine, etc. discoveries to Egypt, an African nation. Western civilization isn’t the group that advocates for their ideas being more important than other cultures’; they’re strictly fact-based in their inquiries. After all, what kind of awful people are in favor of discrediting other cultures’ advancements and then completely stealing them and claiming them as their own? Oh wait, that’s exactly what you want to happen.

And then we have the whole “I just claimed that we must destroy science and start over because it is awful and terrible and mean and stinky but hold up one second I just got a notification that I was followed by José Bautista on Twitter” thing. I’d say that was pretty bad timing on her part, but I can’t even call it that because it was completely normal timing because science from other cultures is completely normal and we all use it every day and it makes all of our lives easier.

The only reason I’d ever support scientific fallism is so that I could watch a video on my smartphone of this chick’s repeatedly failed attempts at discovering the smartphone. I wouldn’t hate that.

[via YouTube]

Image via YouTube

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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