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Havers and developers of dad bodies everywhere, rejoice, for the dream is real.
Former world no. 1 and current ninth ranked golfer Rory McIlroy is a young, professional athlete. As such, it only makes sense that he would be interested in different ways to stay in shape and improve his body. Meanwhile, fifth ranked golfer Phil Mickelson just choked on a mouthful of Wendy’s trying to comprehend McIlroy’s thought process.
McIlroy apparently stumbled upon some CrossFit videos on YouTube and for some reason, he thought it looked cool.
“Well would ya look at that,” the Irishman said to himself. “Don’t that be seemin’ like a healthy bit o’ fun?”
Trust us, Rory, it’s not. Thankfully, McIlroy’s fiancée, tennis star Caroline Wozniacki, talked some sense into the guy before he ruined his career forever by snapping both his arms backward at the elbows while trying to do a thruster with something twice his weight as a dozen buzz cut beef monsters with terrifyingly vascular necks rage-screamed encouragement in his face.
“Me arms, me arms!” McIlroy would wail. Meanwhile, his fellow CrossFitters would stand above his broken body and bellow, “EMBRACE THE PAIN, McNASTY!”
But no, there will be no CrossFit for McIlroy. Just lots and lots of golf, at the insistence of his fiancée. Caroline Wozniacki. This woman.
Having a woman who looks like that sleeping with me at night and insisting I play golf by day is pretty much the dream I share with every American heterosexual male. God bless you, Caroline Wozniacki, you saucy Dane. What’s even more fantastic is that while McIlroy hangs out on the golf course, Wozniacki maintains peak physical condition, because she’s a highly ranked professional tennis player. Brings a tear to my eye.
Keep living your life, Rory McIlroy. You’re doing it right.
[via Business Insider]