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Ronaldo Returns Lost Phone To Group Of Hot Girls In Vegas And 100% Has Sex With All Of Them

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What is it with this guy? We’re talking about the number 1 heartthrob in all of Europe. Ronaldo could have any girl he wants. The guy only has sex with women among the top 0.00001% of the hottest on earth, then here is falling ass backwards into the horny arms of four very attractive American women, just because he found a lost phone that belonged to one of them…? Fuck this guy.

Apparently, Cristiano Ronaldo, while vacationing in Vegas, found a lost, unlocked phone and decided to call its owner to track them down — presumably after scrolling through pics (nudes?) to ensure its owner wasn’t a fat slob who burns heaters and drinks Bud Heavy while bellied up to the nickel slots all day. But it’s Ronaldo, so of course the owner of the phone was young and hot, and of course she had three even hotter friends. Below is a picture of them.

Nothing will beat hanging out with @zedd and these little ladies last night.

A photo posted by Austin Woolstenhulme (@austinmilan) on

If I lose my phone, whoever finds it is obviously keeping it and throwing it up on eBay, because that’s what normal people do. Or if they do find it in their heart to return it, it’s 100% the chain-smoking slob at the slot machine. It’s not Nina Agdal, which is the female equivalent to Ronaldo.

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The four apparently hit it off with the kickball superstar and later had dinner and drinks with him, then of course he brought them all up to his penthouse suite, as evidenced by the below Facebook post.

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No doubt Ronaldo has a real solid hangdown on him, too. You know he does. Some girls guys have all the luck.

Images via Facebook, Instagram/ @austinmilan

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Dillon Cheverere

Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. Email:

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