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Reagan’s Childhood Home To Be Demolished, Turned Into Parking Lot For Obama’s Presidential Library

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Like most of you, I was not alive during Reagan’s presidency. The only actual personal memory I have of Reagan is watching the moment of silence held for him at the Belmont Stakes on television the day he died, and the subsequent sadness it invoked in the spectators. I didn’t know much about this former president at the time, but I knew he must’ve been one great man.

Now that I know more about the one they call “The Gipper,” everything makes sense. He lived the American dream. Enjoying the fame of being an actor and holding a political office? He’s the original Arnold Schwarzenegger, but born in America, easier to understand, and with more chimps involved.

At his first inauguration, Reagan famously remarked “Government is the problem.” He firmly believed that it was up to us, the citizens of these United States, to fix the economy. Turns out he was right. Reagan’s version of supply-side economics, or Reaganomics, led to one of the longest peacetime economic expansions in U.S. history.

Not only did he fix our economy, dude ended the fucking Cold War! That annoying ass 46-year-long game where the Soviets kept trying to show us how big their dicks were? Yeah, The Gipper wasn’t having any of that shit. Reagan told Mr. Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin wall, helping turn Germany into the weird country it is today, and spreading one of his favorite things: freedom. While RR’s “tear down this wall” speech played an important role in ending the Cold War, the main avenue through which he ended the Cold War was much more badass. Dude literally built up so much arms and other weaponry that it caused the commies to say “holy shitski.” They knew they couldn’t hang with Ron, and decided that peace was better than getting beat the fuck down if a conflict were to arise.

If Barack Obama has his way, however, the Berlin Wall isn’t the only thing that’s going to have been torn down.

President Ronald Reagan’s childhood home in Chicago is scheduled to be demolished. The University of Chicago recently purchased the property and announced that it intends to turn the property into a parking lot. According to a report in The Washington Times, that plot could soon be the parking lot for the future site of President Barack Obama’s presidential library.

What the fuck, Barry? How would you like it if your boyhood home in Kenya was torn down?

Seriously though, this is just disgraceful. Reagan grew up in this home. He played in this home. He almost died of pneumonia in this home. This home shaped one of the greatest Americans who ever lived. Why would you tear it down just to make a parking lot for your library?

Some have said that the liberal Chicago establishment does not want a reminder that Reagan, a conservative icon, once lived in the city.

This story just gets more and more ridiculous. Let me get this straight, Chicago: you don’t want a reminder that RONALD FUCKING REAGAN lived in your city because he was a conservative? Alright, then let’s take away all the other things in Chicago that could serve as a reminder of conservatism. These include, most notably, every nice thing in the city of Chicago.

How are you just gonna fuck over the legacy of one of the greatest presidents this country has ever known? I thought politicians were supposed to have each other’s backs? Did Dubya not look the other way when Tricky Dick Cheney shot that “quail?” And he’s not just any politician, he’s a former president. There have only been 44 of those.

You can’t successfully not fuck over 43 other dudes? You’d make a terrible pledge, Barack.

[via Washington Times]

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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