======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Until the dab was introduced as a post-goal celebration in FIFA 17, I did the exact same celebrations every single time I scored a goal (of which there were many). I actually can’t tell you what the exact button strokes were — after the ball would go in the ball, muscle memory took over and enacted the celebration scheme for me — but I can tell you that it went from the gaudy “double arm swing” right into the dickish “dead fish.” When my opponents would score their goals (of which there were few), I noticed that I wasn’t alone in this celly combo. The people have spoken and decided that it’s the routine that reigns supreme. The following video cements that notion.
The double arm swing is one thing to pull off in real life. Anybody’s capable of that. I’d probably need to stretch for a few weeks in preparation or risk pulling a hammy, but it’s nothing that takes any real courage or panache to pull off. The dead fish, on the other hand? That’s a skill that requires a true craftsman. A real go-getter who’s willing to put his body in harm’s way for the sole purpose of showboating. It’s pretty much the soccer version of this:
Professional soccer, as opposed to the red tide-riddled Gulf of Mexico, needs more dead fish. Unlike in the NFL, you’re pretty much allowed to do whatever you want in celebration out on the pitch (aside from taking your jersey off). Let’s see what these guys got..
Image via YouTube