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I Believe The Guy Who Denies Shitting His Pants In A Casino

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Who shit themselves in the casino? This is a distant cousin to who farted in the elevator? The Kentucky man accused of this crime vehemently denies any pants shitting. He’s either immune to embarrassment or definitely telling the truth because being able to shit yourself then show your face on the news as the guy who shit himself is a wild move.

From KMOV:

Tyler, who asked FOX19 NOW not to share his last name, was asked to leave because of the stain security said he had on his pants.

When he went to use the bathroom a casino spokesperson said three customers saw him throwing out his underwear and complained that he smelled.

“This occurred during the $1,000 free money giveaway in the poker room,” he said.  “I feel extremely embarrassed and hope that this is not done to any more casino patrons.”

Tyler said he won $2,000 as part of the contest and feels he was thrown out because the casino did not want him to win any more money.

A representative from JACK Casino said they do have visual evidence that they are not allowed to release without a court order.

SHOW THE VISUAL EVIDENCE, JACK CASINO. Are you scared? Where are the tapes or photos or shitty pair of underwear or whatever the fuck you have? Let’s see it!

Let’s rank the most likely scenarios of what could have happened.

1. The guy shit his pants, and is trying to save face.
2. The casino does this all time to kick people out who are winning too much, and this is just the first person with enough backbone to put up a fight.
3. Somebody else shit their pants and this was just a horrible mix-up.
4. The people in the poker room reported this guy because he’s an annoying asshole.
5. The guy was blackout drunk and really doesn’t know that he shit his pants.

Initial instinct, I’ve gotta go with door number two. This guy was the victim of a casino scam. They wanted his lucky ass out. See, I’ve solved this riddle. If it was really him, all they needed to do was ask if he was wearing any underwear. If he wasn’t, then we know who was tossing their drawers in the bathroom. If he was, then they had the wrong guy. Mystery solved. The fact that nothing is mentioned of them asking that is the smoking gun for me.

So on that note, I would like to officially announce that I stand in solidarity with Tyler, aka the guy who ALLEGEDLY shit his pants in a casino, but actually didn’t because casinos are owned by scheming dirtbags. 

[via KMOV]

Image via Shutterstock

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Dent

Washed Up Former Athlete. Totally over my ex-girlfriend. I hold the distinct honor of being the only player in my school's history to receive a football scholarship without being able to bench 225 lbs.

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