Philadelphia Phillies Have Fan Q&A With Pat “The Bat” Burrell On Twitter, It Gets Predictably Sexual

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The man, the myth, the “machine,” Pat Burrell is getting inducted into the Philadelphia Phillies “Wall of Fame” this weekend. Despite essentially playing his entire career with a mangled club foot and comically oversized Popeye forearms, he put together nine solid seasons in the heart of the order with my Phils, capped off with the only championship I’ve seen and probably will see in the remainder of my dark, cold days as a Philadelphia sports fan. Burrell could crush the seams off a baseball, so long as it wasn’t a curveball, but if he was half the player on the diamond that he was off it, he’d be the greatest to ever swing a big stick.

For those unfamiliar, his sexual escapades have reached Paul Bunyan like folklore. If there’s a legal female within a hundred mile radius of the power hitting left fielder, at any given time, she most likely has slept with or will inevitably sleep with Pat “The Bat.”

So when the social media team for the Phillies announced that they were doing a #ChatWithPat Q&A, I knew exactly which glorious road this was going to head down.

Next to “Hollywood” Hamels going out with a no-no, this is sadly the best moment of this franchise’s pathetic season. Just take me back to the pre-Rubén Amaro days.

Image via Twitter

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Dan Regester

Dan Regester @Dan_Regester is a Senior Writer and Video Guy for Grandex Media. Delco trash. UCF alum. Famous FIJI on Wikipedia. Bit of a gambling problem. Advocate of shipping the homeless to Mars. Email tips to

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