Oops, Now The Government Won’t Allow Powdered Booze

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Leave it to the regulation-loving, innovation-crushing fun police–you know, our government–to take the joy out of a product that could potentially kill tons of easily susceptible college kids. Damn commies.

Days after a federal bureau approved the commercial sale of Palcohol, the powdered alcohol that took the Internet by storm, Big Brother has reneged on its decision. A representative for the U.S. Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau, otherwise known as NAMBLA, sent out an email late Monday stating the approval was granted in error.

Apparently, Palcohol and the government had a miscommunication at the time of approval regarding how much Palcohol could go into one bag. Such a glaring oversight of messing up the allowable quantity on a product is something you’d expect out of a couple high school students working on a chemistry project, not from top-level federal officials and attorneys.

If that excuse seem fishy to you, you’re not the only one.

From USA Today:

Robert Lehrman, who runs a beverage law website that initially reported on the product, noted that Palcohol had to have gone through an extensive process before reaching the label approval stage.

“An oversight of this nature does not ring true to me,” Lehrman said in a phone interview. He suggested that the bureau may have heard back from lawmakers wanting more information on the powdered alcohols.

I am firmly on record when I say I think Palcohol is a moronic idea that’s marketed toward people who are equally definitely more idiotic. Think that Four Loko nonsense all over again, but up the try-hard factor by a solid six and a half.

As dumb as Palcohol is, though, what’s even dumber is the excuse the feds are giving as to why this stupid product is now being taken off the shelves. There wasn’t some dramatically obvious error. You, the feds, got scolded by some letter-writing moms and lawmakers and are now backpedaling with your tails between your legs. Stick to your guns, man. Almost makes me want to get my hands on the stuff.

Besides, if there’s one thing that American history has taught us, it’s that prohibition totally works–especially when it’s founded on brilliant logic like, “I didn’t read.”

[via USA Today]

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J Parks Caldwell

J. Parks Caldwell is a senior contributing writer for Total Frat Move, Rowdy Gentleman, and Post Grad Problems. He frequently blesses the rains down in Africa.

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