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NYC Approves New Apartment That Makes Poors Enter Through Back

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Getting fat tax-breaks, while simultaneously segregating poor people. It’s a TFM. In what is probably one of the biggest power moves we have seen in recent years, Extell Development Company is building a 33 story high-rise luxury apartment in which low income (poor) tenants will have a separate entrance. In order to benefit from gracious tax exemptions, 55 of the 219 units will be set aside for the poors. To keep the riff raff from commingling with their wealthier tenants, Extell is designing the building so that those 55 units are only accessible through the back-alley. So if you are a wealthy tenant, you will probably have a jovial doorman whom you tip generously every Christmas. If you are poor, you’ll have to deal with the homeless dude who smells like the Devry Guy after a typical Saturday night out. He smells heavily of piss, booze, and rejection, FYI. The only tip you’ll have to worry about is the tip of a rusty shank that may be lodged into your torso after a particularly violent NYC mugging.

Apparently there was quite a bit of outrage when news of this planned leaked. Fellow luxury developer, Toll Brothers, had this to say.

“No one ever said that the goal was full integration of these populations,” said David Von Spreckelsen, senior vice president at Toll Brothers. “So now you have politicians talking about that, saying how horrible those back doors are. I think it’s unfair to expect very high-income homeowners who paid a fortune to live in their building to have to be in the same boat as low-income renters, who are very fortunate to live in a new building in a great neighborhood.”

Von Spreckelsen makes a good point. These luxury developers are doing the low-income renters a favor by giving them luxury apartments at affordable prices, who cares where they have to enter the building, right? On a separate note, Von Spreckelsen is a fantastic name for a dick. I think my next dick pic I Snapchat to the TSM Intern will be with a little top hat and monocle, captioned “The Von Spreckelsen.” She’ll love it.

Anyway, New York City’s Department of Housing Preservation and Development has approved Extell’s plan. Along with the tax breaks, Extell also will be allowed to build a larger building than they would have been able to without the low-income units. It’s a win-win for everyone involved, in my book. Rich people won’t have to deal with poor people. Poor people get to live like rich people, and the homeless dude behind the dumpster will get a lot more foot traffic for possible muggings. It’s trickle-down economics at its finest.

[via Daily Mail]

Image via Extell Residential

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Harrison Lee

The Boulevard is a Content Manager for Grandex, Inc. He hates soccer and terrorists. He will forget more about sports than you will ever know in your lifetime.

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