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In their latest slew of rhetoric and shit talking, North Korea has released a propaganda film that among other things shows a fictional attack on Washington D.C. In the video, missiles are shown hitting the White House, Capitol building, and an aircraft carrier. Scary stuff, for sure folks, but is it possible?
The short and simple answer is no. Part of what makes this video so funny is how it is edited. It shows artillery pieces or truck-mounted rocket systems (primitive, shittier versions of our MLRS) firing and then cuts to scenes of our most important buildings being destroyed. Maybe the North Koreans think their weapons have greater capabilities than they do (oh wait, they absolutely think that), but it seems to me that Washington D.C. is a little too far to hit with artillery fire. The rockets shown being fired are launched from what appears to be a B<-21 multiple rocket launcher. This weapons system, first used in 1964 by the Soviet Union, has since been modified, but is still considered obsolete by just about everybody. Now, I’m no military expert, but it seems to me that a weapons system that has an effective range of roughly 19 miles wouldn’t really be able to hit D.C. Like I said though, I’m no expert.
The best part about this video is the shitty editing. I mean, really, I was doing better shit with Final Cut in my 11th grade TV production class. Seriously, all the North Korean propaganda personnel did was take still images of U.S. buildings and equipment and then put a shittily-made explosion on top of it. I’m talking early 1980s C-movie Sci Fi shitty. I’m sorry, Kim Jong Un, but did you honestly think that would scare anyone? There is vintage Nazi propaganda more intimidating than this, and we already won that war. Porn has better editing than your government-funded films do. Hell, I’d wager more effort goes into editing a 45 second “This is TFM” video than went into North Korea’s latest attempt at raising their own national morale. Considering they can’t properly make a four minute YouTube video, how the fuck do they think they’re going to beat us in a war? At this point I’m assuming the first thirty minutes of that abominable Red Dawn remake starring Thor and the formerly fat Nickelodeon kid is playing on a loop for all three North Korean TV stations.
Here it is: