Look, I’m not here to judge you if you have a girlfriend. Great if you do, great if you don’t; your situation does not affect me at all. However, when one of my closest friends is left a battered shell of a man because of a girlfriend that just won’t quit, that does affect me.
It wasn’t until I was at the bar the other night, about to take a snap of the boys for the story, when I finally realized something was wrong. As I panned my phone around all the guys, everyone was thrilled, throwing their drinks up to show the world how cool they are. That is, everyone except for my buddy Jake. He, on the other hand, was vehemently waving his hands in a “no, don’t do it” motion.
Confused, I asked him what was wrong.
“If Sarah saw me here, she would freak out,” he whimpered.
The panic in his voice was alarming. Wide-eyed, he darted his attention from corner to corner, checking to make sure he was not being watched.
“Dude, don’t be so paranoid. It’s all good,” I reassured.
“No, you don’t fucking get it, dude!” He was shouting now.
“I told her I was going to bed, and if she finds out I’m here, then I’m in big trouble.”
With the way he was talking, you’d have thought he was a high school boy who had just snuck out of his parents’ house, not a 22-year-old adult. A nervous feeling overcame me.
“Trouble? What does that mean?”
I wasn’t sure that I wanted an answer, but somebody had to ask.
“I don’t want to talk about it; just please don’t record me.”
It was at this moment that I started to reflect on how Jake had been acting for the last few months. He had been moody, distant, and not at all down to do wild shit with the boys like the Jake I was used to. Collectively as a group, we’d noticed the change. We were never able to identify the culprit, however.
We had our theories. Maybe it’s just stress — his plate had been pretty full for a while with summer school leading right into the fall semester. He’d started a new internship during that time as well — maybe that’s what’s weighing on him. But we never thought that the problem was her.
I mean the way they looked on Instagram, there couldn’t be a more picturesque couple. People revered their relationship. Personally, I had never been a fan; in my experience, Sarah was a conniving she-devil. But I’m also admittedly not the easiest to get along with, so I didn’t object to the relationship. If she was making him happy, then I could deal with it. Others didn’t seem to mind her either, and from what our mutual friend reported, all was good.
Since that one night at the bar, however, our whole group has started paying much closer attention — and what we found out is that all is not good. We see it when we’re out and he has to call every ten minutes to reassure her he’s not with “some slut.” We see it when she verbally berates him for not coming to every event that she has planned for them regardless of how full his schedule is. We see it when we pry and find out she’s holding out sex for weeks at a time over the smallest things. All of that is why now — different than before — when we see these behaviors we don’t like? We ask questions.
“Hey J-Dawg, where you going?”
“Sarah wants us to go watch the sunset on the beach.”
“But the beach is an hour away… Don’t you have night class?”
“Oh yeah, I had to skip. It’s no big deal.”
This girl made my mans skip class and then drive AN HOUR to the nearest beach just so that she could post something on the Gram to make everyone think they’re perfect. “Spontaneous beach trip with the greatest.” ALARMING.
That’s just one of the many examples of the mistreatment going on here. This chick runs every aspect of Jake’s life. We’ve tried to intervene, but to no avail. And Jake? He’s either too tired or too brainwashed to fight back.
We must find a way to get him out of this relationship. Do we sabotage? Do we confront her about the mistreatment? Hell, do we call the cops and report her for psychological abuse?
My friends and I are going to band together and work on a plan to get him back — that much is certain. But in the meantime, I have a special request for all of you.
Any man out there reading this that may be in a similar situation to my friend Jake, please get help. You’re than just some face to put up on Instagram. Your friends love you, and they want you back. Please go back to them. There’s so much more in this world out there for you. Step up, and be brave. Take your life back..
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