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Masters Week: It’s Finally Here

Finally, the pregame is over, and Masters week 2011 is upon us. It is, indeed, a tradition unlike any other. If you skipped class today and watched the Par 3 Contest, then you’re probably already walking around with a visor and a half chub. If you can’t avoid work this week, you don’t have to miss the action. You can stream the entire tournament on Masters.com, or use The Masters Golf Tournament iPhone app if necessary.

As we all know, Augusta National is a club rich with history, as well as stories of great triumph and defeat. Though there are women on the membership waiting list (to appease the public), no woman has ever been admitted. As former chairman of the club “Hootie” Johnson once said, “Our membership is single gender just as many other organizations and clubs all across America. These would include junior Leagues, sororities, fraternities, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, and countless others. And we all have a moral and legal right to organize our clubs the way we wish.” FaF. So while you watch this week, kick back and enjoy the scenery knowing full well no woman has tarnished this beautiful piece of earth with her pink golf balls and 30-yard worm burners. While you’re at it, have the sorosty fix you up an Arnold Palmer (or make it a John Daly). When she brings it say, “Hey, thanks sweetheart, but you’ll never step foot on a golf course with me,” just to be sure you’re on the same page.

Before you place your bets on this year’s tournament, consider your choices carefully. We want that green jacket to stay here in the USA, not going overseas. Betting against America is just like rooting against America. Here are some current odds for the tournament on Sportsbook.com:

  • Phil Mickelson 11/2
  • Tiger Woods 8/1
  • Nick Watney 15/1
  • Lee Westwood 15/1
  • Martin Kaymer 20/1
  • Bubba Watson 20/1
  • Aaron Baddeley 20/1
  • Rory McIlroy 20/1
  • Dustin Johnson 20/1
  • Hunter Mahan 25/1
  • Matt Kuchar 25/1
  • Luke Donald 25/1
  • Anthony Kim 30/1

You’ll notice we didn’t post Rickie Fowler’s odds. That’s because he’s a fucking GDI:

Great clip of Phil:

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