Marshall TE Celebrates Bowl Game TD By Pretending Football Is A Beer, Which Confused Some Narcs

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Touchdown celebrations have become my favorite part of the overrated, money-making snooze fest that has unfortunately become professional football. If any NFL players need inspiration, look at the police body cam footage of the dance I did after getting released from jail for taking part in a very minor pyramid scheme that was endorsed by Gary Busey. Hey, Gronk — do that next time you’re in the end zone.

On a lower-down level, Marshall University TE Ryan Yuracheck had the right idea when he decided to execute a danger can/detonator/Rumpelstiltskin in the end zone after scoring a touchdown in the team’s bowl game versus Colorado State.

Love it. It’s definitely better than that showboating asshole Odell Beckham Jr.’s pissing dog celebration from earlier this season.

Apparently danger canning a beer is a foreign concept to Yahoo! Sports, though, as you can see in the above tweet caption as well as below:

At first I thought Yurachek was hitting himself in the helmet with the football, but he was definitely pretending to chug a beer, with the football in place of the beer. Of course, he had to break it over his head first.

That was one of the most cringeworthy things I’ve ever read. I think I lost some of the very few IQ points I have left while reading that. Apparently whoever wrote this scholarly analysis of college football has never even been to a college tailgate. Dude couldn’t sound more like a narc if he tried. Mr. Boy Scout sports reporter even ended his article with a little narc-y disclaimer.

And don’t worry, friends. Yurachek, Marshall’s second-leading receiver, is 21. This blog does not promote underage drinking.

Oh, thank goodness. Underage mimicked drinking is definitely a truly growing and underrated problem for the NCAA.

As good as Yurachek is, he most likely isn’t getting drafted, so let the dude have his 15 fake drunken minutes of athletic fame.

[via Yahoo Sports]

Image via ESPN

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Previously known for being the 4th best improv comedian in the state of New Jersey, he enjoyed a brief career in politics by serving on his fraternity's eboard until a scandal not as bad as the Lewinsky scandal, but more memorable than Whitewater lead to his resignation. Now, he spends his time making God awful jokes in chapter meetings, rooting for a shitty New Jersey hockey team, and serving on the congressional committee set to determine whether Oprah Winfrey should be classified as a cult or a religion.

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