Mailbag: Dipping, Bad Grades, And Relationship Troubles

This is a recurring TFM series. Catch up with all installments of Mailbag by visiting the archive.

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Welcome to the TFM Mailbag, wherein I will answer your questions to the best of my ability. Send your questions to No topics are off limits.

Hey Wes,

My roommate has been dipping as long as I’ve known him, and lately he’s been going through a can a day, sometimes more. I get that he’s an adult and can do what he wants, but it makes our room smell gross when girls are over, and it makes me want to vomit when he’s spitting into a cup on road trips and the smell fills up the car. How do I go about getting him to stop or to be more respectful about it?

This will be a group effort. You need to get as many friends as possible to occasionally give him shit for dipping, whether that entails simply ribbing him for his poor hygiene or calling him a cousin fucker. If he’s getting it from all angles, he’ll probably come around and change his habits at least a little bit. If not, then he’s a shit friend anyway and you’ll just have to get into a new living situation as soon as possible.

Need some help.

My girlfriend and I are both graduating in May, and we’ve been dating for about a year and a half. Problem is, she’s been really distant ever since we got back into town from Christmas Break. Should I be worried about this? I just don’t get what’s going on.

Come on man, you didn’t even specify where your girl was over break. So let me pick out a few possible scenarios and explain what probably happened with each of them.

Puerto Vallarta: She banged a DJ who has a four-digit following on SoundCloud.

Vail, Colorado: She banged her ski instructor.

Disneyland: She banged a guy in a Donald Duck costume.

Her hometown: She banged her high school boyfriend.

Not looking good for you, bud.

This is not okay.

I’m just starting my second week of classes, and I might already be fucked. The prof gave us required reading over the break, and I didn’t even bother to download the text files until the day before the first lecture. We had a test on the reading on day one, and I only got 12 out of 50 questions right. The class is worth 300 points total, so now the highest grade I can get is already a B+. I can’t drop the class because it isn’t offered in the summer or fall. What do I do?

I get that mandatory reading assignments over break are bullshit, but nothing you say or do will get you out of having to do them. My practical advice would be to give it your all, try to get as close to full points as possible on everything, then study hard and pull an A on the final exam. Once you do that, talk to your professor and explain that although you fucked up on the first assignment, you’ve been rock solid since then.

The problem is, you haven’t really established yourself as someone who is on top of things and capable of getting that done. You’ll probably have to come to terms with losing your focus here and there and getting by with a 70% in the class. That’s not so bad unless you’re pre-med or pre-law. I graduated with a fucking 2.9 and still managed to get a really good job, so there is hope.


Spring rush is starting up at my campus next week. Should I do it, or wait until fall? I’ve heard good and bad things about rushing in the spring.

I’d say do it. It’s true that rushing in the spring isn’t quite as fun as rushing in the fall is, but you’ll probably be part of a smaller and more tight-knit pledge class than if you’d waited until fall. If you get pledging over with in the spring, you’ll get to cruise into the summer and then enjoy the fall as an active. It’s true that there’s a lot more to do in the fall, but you’ll be able to do a lot more as an active than as a pledge.

One other thing to note is the possibility that not all fraternities will be participating in spring rush. If you notice that a lot of the better fraternities are holding out and not taking spring pledges, you might be better off waiting until you can play the entire field.

Remember to send any and all questions you have to

Image via Wikimedia Commons

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WJ Cope

He's the real reason people say "No one likes you when you're 23."

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