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Kings Center Jarret Stoll Has Great Lawyers, Doesn’t Get Charged For Molly Possession

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Kings Center Jarret Stoll Has Great Lawyers, Doesn't Get Charged For Molly Possession

Eight grams of Molly and an 8-ball of cocaine? Odds are good that I’m lying naked and dead in a motel room after trying to break the Guinness World Record for how many drugs you can snort off a prostitute’s ass.

However, in Vegas, that amount of drugs means you and your teammates are in for a good time. Kings center/Erin Andrews plower Jarret Stoll was arrested back in April at MGM Grand with a shit ton of Molly and cocaine in his swim trunks.

His life is basically over now. He’s out of a job forever. He’s going to jail for life. He’ll never see the light of day. Have fun getting ass blasted by Zdeno Chara-looking convicts.

Wait. No. I forgot. He’s rich.

Stoll is instead facing just one felony count of possession of a controlled substance relating to the cocaine.

From The Orange County Register:

Kings center Jarret Stoll was charged with one felony count of cocaine possession Monday, two months after he was arrested poolside at a Las Vegas hotel.

I’m not a scientist, but how do you get $800-worth of MDMA to disappear from your charges? Also, what’s the name and contact information for your lawyer? Also, while I’m here, can I borrow some money/Molly/cocaine?

I’ll take my answer off the air.

If convicted, Stoll faces up to four years in jail or probation. He’ll get probation.

[via The Orange County Register]

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El Taco

Either a war hero or war criminal depending on how you look at it

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