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Kings Center Jarret Stoll Has Great Lawyers, Doesn’t Get Charged For Molly Possession

Kings Center Jarret Stoll Has Great Lawyers, Doesn't Get Charged For Molly Possession

Eight grams of Molly and an 8-ball of cocaine? Odds are good that I’m lying naked and dead in a motel room after trying to break the Guinness World Record for how many drugs you can snort off a prostitute’s ass.

However, in Vegas, that amount of drugs means you and your teammates are in for a good time. Kings center/Erin Andrews plower Jarret Stoll was arrested back in April at MGM Grand with a shit ton of Molly and cocaine in his swim trunks.

His life is basically over now. He’s out of a job forever. He’s going to jail for life. He’ll never see the light of day. Have fun getting ass blasted by Zdeno Chara-looking convicts.

Wait. No. I forgot. He’s rich.

Stoll is instead facing just one felony count of possession of a controlled substance relating to the cocaine.

From The Orange County Register:

Kings center Jarret Stoll was charged with one felony count of cocaine possession Monday, two months after he was arrested poolside at a Las Vegas hotel.

I’m not a scientist, but how do you get $800-worth of MDMA to disappear from your charges? Also, what’s the name and contact information for your lawyer? Also, while I’m here, can I borrow some money/Molly/cocaine?

I’ll take my answer off the air.

If convicted, Stoll faces up to four years in jail or probation. He’ll get probation.

[via The Orange County Register]

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El Taco

Either a war hero or war criminal depending on how you look at it

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