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Fraternities aren’t all about banging hot girls, getting blackout drunk at parties, and banging hot girls. It’s much deeper than that — it’s about studying hard, making lasting friendships, trying to bang hot girls, and hopefully making money in the future. And now, there’s scientific evidence to back that up as a new study says joining a fraternity in college will drop your GPA but lead to a better earning wage down the road.
Being a member of a fraternity in college lowers a student GPA by approximately 0.25 points on the traditional four-point scale, but raises future income by around 36%, according to a paper, “Social Animal House: The Economic and Academic Consequences of Fraternity Membership,” published by two economists from Union College in Schenectady, New York. “For this reason, joining a fraternity may be a rational decision that improves the long-term prospects of an individual student despite its damaging effects on a student’s grades,” the paper concluded.
“These results suggest that fraternity membership causally produces large gains in social capital, which more than outweigh its negative effects on human capital for potential members,” they concluded.
See, I specifically said “studying hard” in the intro, not getting smarter. I never said there was proof the study hard:dumb decision ratio was in favor of making grade gains; for every hour you study, I guarantee there are at least three to four hours of terrible decision-making organically in your life when you live in the fraternity house. Skip reading the chapters for econ in favor of playing pin the tail on the pledge? Say no more, fam. Pin-the-tail it is. Professor Ryan is the worst teacher of all time, anyways (thanks again for that D-).
Interestingly, the researchers say alcohol was essentially a non-factor. The paper states “alcohol consumption plays a relatively minor role” in terms of grades. I’ve never gotten a boner from reading a scientific study before, but this one definitely is giving me a semi. Certainly moving the needle.
I’m just glad that we finally have proof that it’s not about the grades you make, but rather the hands you shake while in college. Now, if we could start working on a study regarding the best ways to evade police on foot while wasted, that’d be greatly appreciated..