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Jimmy John’s Is The Official Sub Joint Of People Who Don’t Eat Ass

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jimmy johns twitter

Doing social media customer service for a national brand sounds like the most exhausting job of all time. While people sometimes take to social media to talk about how much they love a certain brand, many, many more people use social media to post about how they fucking hate a brand and want nothing more than for everyone involved with said brand, including the lowest of underlings, to be sodomized with a rusty butcher knife.

So it’s no surprise that a Jimmy John’s social media dude decided to have some fun on the job (which was eventually deleted) while responding to a jealous hater.


What’s up with Jimmy John’s acting like eating ass is taboo? It’s 2016. Nothing is weird anymore. Not even clown hunting.

Great take here from my boy WeNotSocks. I agree with him that Jimmy John’s is not good, and that Jimmy John Liautaud, a notable philanthropist, seems like a good dude (aside from his big game hunting past). The subs at Jimmy John’s are so painfully average. I only order JJ’s if I’m either too lazy or too busy to leave the office for lunch, and every time I do, I’m massively underwhelmed. Jimmy John’s is like army food for civilians. It’s not great by any stretch of the imagination, but do you know what it is? Food.

What I’m trying to say is, I’d rather eat ass than a Jimmy John’s sandwich as well, Socks.

Image via Ken Wolter /

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Jared Borislow

Jared Borislow (né The DeVry Guy) is a Senior Writer for Grandex Inc and a 2015 graduate of the University of Wisconsin.

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