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Jason Dufner is about as frat as it gets when it comes to pro golfers. He’s an SEC alum, he throws in monstrous lips while he plays, and he pulled a wife at least three points out of his league, a point gap that only widens with Dufner’s waistline, because the dude is in no way trying to fend off the steady onset of his dad/beer body.
True to SEC alumnus form, Dufner would really like to skip work, aka this weekend’s World Challenge tournament, in order to watch his alma mater, the Auburn Tigers, play in the SEC Championship Game against the Missouri Tigers. And, speaking of Tigers, Dufner asked the guy in charge of said tournament, Tiger Woods, if he could go ahead and shuffle his schedule.
Dear Mr @TigerWoods I petition the event this week to play 36 holes Thurs and Friday,so I can watch my beloved Auburn play for SEC champ thx
— Jason Dufner (@JasonDufner) December 2, 2013
To be fair to Dufner, there are probably doctors who plan on rescheduling surgery to watch the game.
“If you can’t find me a heart to put in this dying asshole’s chest sooner than Saturday, then I will rip open your ribcage and use yours! WAR DAMN!”
Also, this tournament isn’t exactly important, in terms of golf, so I don’t see this request as all that outrageous. Let the guy play 36 Thursday and Friday. Fuck it. I’ve never even heard of this tourney. If not, Dufner’s caddie’s number one job is going to be live streaming the game as Dufner plays the most half-hearted 18 of his life.