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Jacksonville Jaguars To Distract Fans From Team’s Awfulness With New, Badass, Poolside Cabana Suites

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In order to draw fans to a losing franchise, the Jacksonville Jaguars management has taken out 9,500 seats in the north end zone and is replacing them with a two-level party deck. The deck will include two pools and 16 cabanas, complete with plush furniture. This is the perfect plan, because these fans need to be distracted from how awful their NFL team is. Though the party deck seems like a cool idea, maybe they should have just drafted Johnny Manziel instead of Blaine Gabbert 2.0.

According to ESPN, “Companies or fans can rent one of the four poolside cabanas on the first level for $12,500 a game, or $250 per person. The package includes 50 tickets and the tickets are all-you-can-eat and drink. Wine and beer will be served through the third quarter, as is the case with the rest of the stadium. A similar package of 20 tickets on the upper level of the party deck, which does not include pool access, costs $3,000 a game, or $150 per person.”

This $63 million addition to one of the less remarkable stadiums in the NFL is awesome. When it’s done, the stadium will be home to the world’s largest HD LED video screens, in case the businessmen would rather hang in the pool with their buddies and call girls than hit the new seats on the field or the tables in the club sections and actually watch the games. Businesses have responded. Already, the team reports 65 percent of the in-stadium cabanas for the 2014 season have been sold. Now if the Jags could actually win a few.

[via ESPN]

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Blockparty is a contributing writer for TFM and a 4th generation Texan. With a GPA just good enough to graduate, he is ready to keep on partying, drinking, hazing and gettin’ some.

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