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Is This Cincinnati Bengals Cheerleader the “Female Jerry Sandusky?”

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If she is then I need to figure out a way to turn myself back into a 17-year-old and move my ass to Kentucky. The truth is that Sarah Jones, former Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader and potentially the best high school teacher of all time, is not in any way, shape, or form the “female Jerry Sandusky.” Most likely some shitty journalist said that to sell papers or get higher ratings or whatever. It’s Kentucky, what’d you expect? But even though the title of “female Jerry Sandusky” is incredibly stupid and almost criminally misleading, I’d like to thank whoever made that up. Although it’s probably ruining Sarah Jones’ life, that moniker is going to get this TFM News story an extra twenty or so tweets at the end of the day. WORTH IT!

Sarah Jones, in case you were wondering, stands accused of having sex with a 17-year-old student of hers. By the way, according to my coloring map the age of consent in Kentucky is 16, so she’s not even technically a molester. Also, I’m pretty sure a 17-year-old enjoyed (allegedly) having sex with an NFL cheerleader a lot more than some little kid enjoyed getting rammed in the shower by a grabby old man while a ginger awkwardly excused himself from the room.

Despite the charges, Jones is adamant that she is not guilty. Her attorney, Eric Deters, has said as much:

“The Commonwealth does not have a single witness that there was any sex. There is not a single sealed text message that would reflect there was sex in any state, much less Kentucky. There is no confession. There is no admission. There is only speculative conjecture.”

Assuming Jones has a good lawyer, I don’t really see this case going anywhere… but a boy can dream.


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