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Hindus Gone Wild In Bollywood’s Upcoming Blockbuster Jism 2

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Time to unbuckle those belts – but ever so slowly – and get nice and comfy for a wild and steamy Indian sex romp. Actually that really doesn’t sound all that great, but my pants are already unbuckled, so I guess we’ll just go with it.

The sexual culture of India has long been suppressive of female sexual promiscuity, but this Friday Bollywood is aiming to loosen those chains a notch or two. In Bollywood’s nonstop quest to be as good as Hollywood, the center of the Indian film culture is ready to release the nymphomaniac spirit that dwells between the quivering thighs of Indian women everywhere in the upcoming movie Jism 2. Taking lead role in this pecker-spanker is hardcore porn actress Sunny Leone.

Despite all of it’s advertising and pornographic marketing, not to mention its snuff film title, Jism 2 will feature no slow-mo facials, donkey punches, Cleveland Steamers, Eiffel Towers, or anything that you would expect out of a good ol’ fashioned peep show. Tragically, don’t even expect a glimpse of the chesticles:

The film, which will be released across India on Friday, is pushing the ever-widening sexual boundaries enjoyed by many in urban India. It shows no frontal nudity – government censors monitoring a film industry that long refused to show onscreen kissing would never clear that – but with its oil massages and fantastic lingerie it promises to be one of the most graphic films in Bollywood history.

In another twist of sexual irony, the producers of Jism 2 have faced some troubles advertising it’s frothy movie to American companies such as Google and Apple due to the obvious implications of the movie’s name.

They wrote to us saying I’m sorry it’s a rude word, this is porn,” Bhatt said. “We said no it’s not, it’s a legitimate Hindi film and the word j-i-s-m actually means body.”

Sounds like the Hindus are trying to pull a fast one here. While the word ‘jism’ might actually mean “body,” which I doubt and am not about to take the time to look up, the director knows exactly what he is trying to imply. Which, if you haven’t caught on by now, is jizz.

Regardless of the actual lack of sexual action, it’s sure to be a hot feature, and the critics are already raving. Says one esteemed critic, “I haven’t whacked it that hard since that dance at the end of Slumdog! Gods that was hot!”

So maybe Jism 2 is going to be a huge letdown, but look at the bigger picture, this is but one of many steps to further encourage the women of India to show off their hoo-has, and as men who have long enjoyed the freedoms of viewing fantastic footage of women taking treetrunk dicks since we were the age of 15, we should be happy for the cinematic industry of India. Sort of like a dad giving his son his first beer.

Here’s the trailer:

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