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Love him or hate him, a provoked Baker Mayfield is a Baker Mayfield who will own you in every way possible. The dude doesn’t put up the numbers he does because he doesn’t want to be the best; he does what he does to force the haters and losers (of which there are many) to eat loads upon loads of shit.
So you better believe that the Georgia fans who unleashed a flurry of texts and calls on Mayfield after his cell number was leaked just awakened a beast who will do a lot worse than grab his nuts in their general direction.
First off, I hate to be that guy (I don’t), but allow me to do some light editing to Mayfield’s otherwise flawless comeback.
whoever whomever posted my cell # number, bravo. But(,) I got it changed! And to the Georgia fans that who had the kind words of encouragement …, I applaud e your creativity(.)
Hey, Baker didn’t come here to play school; he came here to make everyone in the state of Georgia cry on New Year’s Day. Sure, Georgia’s defense is stingier than a motherfucker, and Kirby Smart is no Dumb when it comes to coaching. But if you think Baker Mayfield isn’t going to unleash a whomping on the Bulldogs fueled purely by spite, then you clearly don’t have thin skin or have never interacted with someone afflicted by such a condition.
Kansas stiffing him on the handshake? Mayfield still thinks about that. It’s permanently burrowed its way into his brain and is nestled right alongside that time in 4th grade when Mandy Manderson checked the “No” box under his “Will you be my girlfriend?” note.
Just know that on January 1st, Baker Mayfield will put on his clutch jeans one leg at a time and put on an aerial circus the likes of which college football has never before seen. And, following the epic postgame festivities that are sure to transpire immediately following Oklahoma’s victory, he will undoubtedly get yet another alcohol-fueled arrest..
Image via Wikimedia Commons