======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
TEMPE — A once desolate, rundown off-campus fraternity house has become the thriving epicenter of a fad-obsessed university. The 22-man Beta Omicron chapter hasn’t had a pledge class in over three semesters and seemingly accepted their inevitable fate of getting their charter pulled by nationals. But with the recently developed Pokémon Go mobile game exploding onto the scene and sheer dumb luck, there’s optimism that the fraternity can salvage at least another semester of existence.
“We were all playing the day it was released and realized fairly quickly that there was something special about our property,” says chapter president Oliver Wood. “Where most people with the app generally run into nothing but Zubats, Rattatas, and Pidgeys, we were catching Scythers, Hitmonlees, and Electabuzzes.”
Word got around school, and thousands of students have since made the pilgrimage to the BO house.
“It started out with a few random asian kids wandering into our driveway the next day,” fifth-year-senior Todd Henderson tells TFM. “I come back from the test lab a few hours later, and our front lawn looks like an FDR internment camp. I’ve never seen so many orientals with their smart phones out other than that time I went to Disney World… and the Statue of Liberty. Actually, any cliché touristy photo op now that I think about it. Those people are little ninjas with a camera, especially when there’s a ‘no photography’ sign. You’re not writing this all down, are you?”
With the influx of foot traffic on their land increasing by 10,000 percent, the fraternity has started to capitalize on the sudden exposure. As of today, 42 of the 44 bids dished out to eligible visitors have been accepted — more than tripling the struggling organization in size.
“Someone caught a Moltres Saturday, and now we can’t write bids fast enough,” remarked recruitment chair Geoffrey Banks. “We even have Chi Os and Tri Delts swinging by nowadays. They don’t exactly talk to us, or even make eye contact, but that’s progress in every sense of the word.”
There’s no telling just how far this flash in the pan app can take the nearly dead fraternity, but for now, there’s never been a better time to be a Beta Omicron..
Image via Youtube
If you take pleasure out of watching poorly-run fraternities run themselves into the ground, check out our Exec Board series