======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Last fall, Floyd ‘Money’ Mayweather retired undefeated after a legendary boxing career. In the midst of constant comeback rumors, Floyd still seems to be keeping himself busy, mostly by stunting on Instagram and getting pet tigers for some reason.
After his blockbuster bout with Manny Pacquiao last year, Manny has kept himself busy with Tim Bradley rematches and homophobic comments. Floyd, on the other hand, seems to be spending retirement splurging on multiple private jets and gambling in Vegas like a maniac.
There’s a word for a guy like that, it’s called “hero.”
In addition to being an undisputed champ and flamboyantly flashy public personality, Mr. Mayweather is also a businessman. His company Mayweather Promotions seems to be thriving. But from the looks of it, he’s not stopping there.
Floyd may be branching out into a new business venture: titty bars.
On his Instagram, he recently promoted an ad for a new gentlemen’s club.
Making it rain in a strip club you yourself own sounds so baller it feels blasphemous.
Like everyone else, when I hear “strip club,” I think Floyd Mayweather. I can already imagine the ads. “Do you love big boobs and boxing gloves? Shaved snatches and mouth guards? Championship belts and stretch marks? Do you hate Manny Pacquiao and love girls with daddy issues? Well, we’ve got the place for you!”
Need somewhere to take your girl for Valentine’s Day next year? Need a place to bond with your dad next Father’s Day? Is your 8-year-old brother’s birthday coming up and he doesn’t know where to celebrate it? Have no fear; Floyd’s got you, fam.
Personally, I hope this becomes a trend in sports. I hope everyone from Tom Brady to Lebron James invests in their own titty bars after they retire. Tiger Woods, too, but he obviously already will. I have no respect for any multimillionaire athlete who doesn’t. The fact that Mike Tyson never opened up a strip club called “The Thrip Club” is the reason why I have no faith in humanity. Shame on you, Mike.
There have been rumors of Mayweather jumping back into the ring, and possibly even boxing MMA superstar Conor McGregor (aka beating the shit out of someone who can’t even box for an inevitably fat paycheck). But if he has any brains, I think he should just keep counting hundreds and getting lap dances until he over-spends himself into complete bankruptcy. That’s the American way.
I already am anticipating your angry comments. Everyone seems to hate Floyd. I can already predict all the usual criticism.
“He just runs! He never knocks people out!”
“He cherry picks his opponents and dodges them until they’re out of their prime!”
“He’s too arrogant and cocky!”
“I spent 100 goddamn bucks on that Pacquiao fight and they just danced around the whole time!”
And while those are all very valid points, I have a question, do YOU have your own strip club? No?
He made $650 million from punching people in the face and now he’s got his own strip club. The American Dream..
Image via Youtube