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Florida Man Makes A Beer Run While Eluding Police

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21-year-old Andrew Fatzinger was arrested earlier this week after he was caught vandalizing a home in Lighthouse Point, Florida. Police showed up on the scene where they found Fatzinger looting and vandalizing a home with mustard and graffiti. Not quite as effective as the Wet Bandits, but that’s one terrible burglar calling card. Again, this is a 21-year-old man, not a 16-year-old angsty teenager.

Police pursued Fatzinger (terrible name to grow up with, I’ll give the guy that much) after he stuffed some electronics into a bag and darted out of the house, where the chase led into a neighborhood. The vandal lost police as the chase went into the streets, but a police chopper had already joined the pursuit and continued to monitor the fleeing Fatzinger.

At this point, Fatzinger was probably pretty famished and thinking he could use a couple of cold ones. Police then observed this guy dart into an unoccupied house for a few minutes and then reappeared in the backyard with a couple of brewskis in tow. After realizing that a police helicopter chase may not be the best time to pop a couple Steveweisers, Fatzinger tossed the beers and tried to escape again.

The coppers sent in a K-9 unit after Fatzinger, but Fatzinger did them one better and ended up punching the dog. Not cool. The beer-stealing graffiti artist was apprehended shortly after and faces charges for burglary, grand theft, striking a police dog and resisting arrest with violence. The person who Fatzinger stole the beers from also wants to press charges. If there’s one thing you don’t do, it’s steal another man’s beer. All you had to do was ask, man. Well, ask before you break into their house and punch a police dog in the face.

[via Huffington Post]


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The Champions Tour is a writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems. If you don't know who he is, just ask your older sister about him.

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