======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Ten real submissions, 20 photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
Shooting an empty Coors Light can in your backyard with a 22…while getting a blowy. TFM.
Well, no one can accuse you of not trying.
Consoling a girl who just broke up with her geed boyfriend…by giving her tons of frock. TFM.
Well, no one can accuse you of being unsympathetic.
Wearing American flag Chubbies to meet her parents. TFM.
“You gotta be fucking shittin’ me.” -Her Dad
Got the entire lyrics to “I Believe I Can Fly” tatted on my left rib cage. It got me laid 12 times last week, by girls. TFM.
I don’t doubt this. That song is beautiful.
Dad: “Want to meet at Chick-fil-A?” Me: “Sure, mine or yours?” TFM. #franchiseowners #richaf #upwardsof3millionayearinsales #FaF
FIGHT ME. PLEASE FIGHT ME.
I get so excited when I’m putting my hand down a girl’s Norts for the first time to see if there are pubes there or not! The only thing I can compare it to is opening up a pack of Upper Deck and seeing if I got a Cal Ripken Jr. or Barry Bonds card. TFM.
This guy will be permanently institutionalized by age 25.
Family lawyer recommended I take out a 3 billion dollar insurance plan on my frock ‘n balls. TFM.
Gotta protect your most valuable assets.
My father being the father of two, my name is Ralph and my sister’s name is Lauren. TFM.
Your dad is a try-hard tool, Ralph.
Tell me y’all’s favorite fratty brands!
Who the hell are you? Nice submission. Get the fuck out of here.
I sexually identify as an attack helicopter. Ever since I was a boy, I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I’m fucking retarded, but I don’t care. I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege liberal cunts. TFTC.
I need a beer.