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FAIL FRIDAY: Looking Forward to the Weekend

This is a recurring TFM series. Catch up with all installments of Fail Friday by visiting the archive.

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Twelve real submissions, four photos and three videos, that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

I got the Polo logo tatted on my chest, so even when im swimming im polo’d out. TFM.

Congratulations. Now you’re embarrassing all the time. Just keep your wife beater on at the pool or beach.

Just got $200 for my Yu-Gi-Oh card set. Drinks on me tonight. TFM.

I would’ve given you $2,000. Biggest Yu-Gi-Oh fan ever, right here. Honestly, I’m not sure what the fuck that is. I think it might be like Pokemon. I know it involves Asians.

I was out in the ocean pissing and a girl walks up and I was like, “You don’t want to be standing there, I’m pissing,” and she goes, “I know,” then starts making out with me. TFM.

That’s what I’m talking about! Fucking hot. Spring Break urine fetish make-out. Will she be at Round Up this weekend for a late night golden shower? Lock her down, buddy. Lock her down.

I’m so American that when I get interrupted during sex I get Red, White, and Blue balls. TFM.

How is the coloring distributed? Is each ball an equal amount of each color? Do you have three testicles? You should see a doctor.

Creepier than Doc, a bigger dick than Bif, and got the shakes worse than Marty McFly. TFM.

You need therapy. Badly.

It’s easy to climb the latter of success when your dad owns the latter. TFM.

Your dad owns the “latter,” but couldn’t afford to buy you an education so you could learn to spell. All ladders are off limits to you. You aren’t smart enough to use a ladder.

While driving home from the bars I flipped my pick-up. My slampiece still unconscious, I unbuckled her seat belt and put her in the driver seat. TFM.

Say hi to the father and son spousal abuse duo and the guy with the “rapement” in prison.

Always ignoring the no smoking sign at the gas pump. TFTC. TFM.

Just because you’re TFTC doesn’t mean that you too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.

Stealing her panties as a trophy. NF. Opening your campus mailbox to find she mailed them to you. TFM.
-New York

Your mailbox has chlamydia.

I reminded the manager at Chili’s who my father was and he decided to give me my job back. TFM.

OUR BOY IS MAKING A COMEBACK. Back in the saddle.

Going to Hooters. NS. Going to Buffalo Wild Wings with my Fratdaddy because he likes quality and refuses to be served by trash. TSM.

B-Dubs is definitely a classy joint. If you would rather be served by someone who doesn’t have tits or their GED, it’s an obvious choice.

Smoking a blunt while crafting. TSM.
-New Jersey


The new anthem:

“Fun fun, think about fun. You know what it is. I got this, you got this. My friend is by my right, ayyyyyy. I got this, you got this. Now you know it. Kickin’ in the front seat. Sittin’ in the back seat. Gotta make my mind up, which seat can I take?”

You can’t just go around peeing on people, yelling “TOTAL FRAT MOVE” (WARNING: You don’t see any dick, but there is some stream):

If this ruins your weekend, just watch Rebecca Black again:

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Never getting promoted.

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