When you gotta go, you gotta go. That means if you have to take a piss on your ex-fraternity’s backdoor, then that’s what you have to do.
Thanks to a very astute house mom, the LSU Police Department recently arrested two men for pissing on LSU’s Sigma Chi house and stealing a chair. The men, 20-year-old Alexander McCollam and 21-year-old Logan McCaughey, are being charged with simple burglary and criminal mischief.
LSU PD said they were contacted by the house mother of the Sigma Chi house on the university’s campus after she said she’d discovered the gate on the western side of the house appeared to have been tampered with. She said she reviewed surveillance footage to observe two men pull up at the house in a truck pulling a boat trailer.
Once they’d exited the vehicle, the men were caught on camera as they began urinating on the back door. The suspects could then be seen forcing their way through the wooden gate that was closed and secured with a chain. At around 12:56 a.m., they were seen removing a white-and-gray Lifetime brand chair valued at about $25 from the property before fleeing the scene.
The house mother was also able to identify McCaughey as a former member of the fraternity.
Check out their mugs, too.
Oh, so THIS is what girls mean when they say “keep it in your pants.” I get it now.
I mean, this is one hell of a way to roll up on your old house. They’re lucky this didn’t turn into a high speed chase, because I can’t see boat trailers holding up all that well when the po-po try to pit maneuver you.
I gotta say, though, this house mom is observant AF. She saw the house gate had been tampered with and immediately thought, “Messing with my lawn?! Oh, I’m going to get these little bastards.” Now she’s prosecuting them to the fullest extent of the law. If it was up to her, she’d probably call for the death penalty.
Personally, I think both of them should be spared simply because of that one guy’s mullet-in-training look going on. You’ve got some serious flow happening, bruh. Keep it up.
Thankfully, no chairs were harmed in the making of this alleged heist. The foldable chair was returned safe and sound to the house mom.
McCollam, McCaughey’s alleged accomplice, also turned himself into police.
Luckily, in prison they have toilets. I hear the hazing is only for pussies, though. Best of luck..
Image via LSU Greek Life