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Drunk Kid Raids Stranger’s Home In Underwear, In Desperate Need For Munchies

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We’ve all been driven to do some shameful things in the name of satiating a ravenous bout of the drunchies. If you’ve got a stomach full of alcohol and nothing to soak it up, just about anything is fair game. Condiments. Floor pizza. I’ve even downed some hipster girl’s leftover vegan food.

Some kid from Indiana was so drunk and so hungry that he was driven to entering a stranger’s home in search of nourishment. When a resident sleeping on the couch was awoken by the shameless scrounging, he saw an incoherent Andrew Wozniak, 19, standing in nothing but his skivvies, eating his bag of chips.

Police scooped Wozniak as he walked down a nearby street and took him to a hospital. He had a few words for the doctors and officers, including:

“I’m going to snap both of you at the same time.”

“I’m not drunk.”

“I’m going to get your name out to my boys.”

He was then taken to jail, where this priceless mug was taken.

Wozniak was charged with illegal consumption (of alcohol), residential entry, disorderly conduct and intimidation.

[via UPI]

Image via Shutterstock

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Alex Buscemi

AKA Boosh. Former high school back-up wide receiver. Author of two pretty successful Reddit comments. Recent grad from the University of South Carolina.

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