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Big Halloween Manufacturers Are Definitely Behind This Recent Clown Attack Craze

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I wouldn’t call myself a huge conspiracy theory guy. Sure, I believe allergies are completely fabricated by American pharmaceutical companies to sling dissolving tongue pills and that Stephen Hawking actually died 20 years ago and is just an artificial intelligent computer rolling around a bag of bones, but I would say those fall more in the scientific fact category and are generally accepted by the majority of the world.

That said, the recent influx of clown sightings has me putting on my detective hat and following the money trail. Yes, I’m on record saying that this is either ISIS or aliens, but I believe it goes deeper than that. Someone’s financing the whole operation, and it’s a little too coincidental that a particular holiday is right around the corner as this news becomes hot in the streets.

From My Fox 8:

These news headlines are creating profit for many Halloween retailers across the country. Halloween sales already add up to an estimated $7 billion in the U.S. each year; and it now appears a big part of that number will come from clown costumes.

“Clown mask sales are up more than [300%] from a year ago the same period online,”

Of course, big Halloween manufacturers are behind this all. It’s guerrilla marketing at its finest. Get clowns on the public’s brain and sales will just skyrocket. I bet they funded that abysmal “Suicide Squad” movie, too, just to get girls to dress like Harley Quinn. It makes too much sense.

These assholes are cashing in on our simple minds and either supporting terrorists or extra terrestrials’ conquest of earth. I will not idly sit by and watch it happen. If you go to one of those sketchy Halloween stores that pop up at your local strip mall for a month and make a costume purchase you’re contributing to the downfall of society. Make your own holiday getup and if you see a clown out and about, make sure the message is sent that they’re no longer welcomed in this country.

[via My Fox 8]

Image via Youtube

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Dan Regester

Dan Regester @Dan_Regester is a Senior Writer, Podcast Host, and Video Guy for Grandex Media. He's Delco trash to the core and a UCF cinema studies graduate because he never got around to applying to an actual film school. Dan is a gambling man, crypto investor, and procrastinator. He enjoys long walks to the water fountain between bench press sets and is not a fan of the homeless, the elderly, or the Phoenix Airport. Email tips to

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