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“Clown Lives Matter” March In Arizona Means We’ve Finally Achieved Equality For All

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That’s it. We’ve done it. All the protesters out there can finally pack up and go back to their jobs at 7/11, because this country has finally achieved equal rights for everyone. On October 15, you can witness a seismic shift in the history of our great nation when a “Clown Lives Matter” march will level the playing field once and for all. Book your ticket to Tucson now.

From ABC 15 Arizona:

The march will be at 6:30 p.m. Oct. 15 on 4th Avenue in Tucson. Attendees are invited to show up wearing full clown makeup or masks.

According to a flyer advertising the event, “this is a peaceful way to show clowns are not psycho killers. We want the public to feel safe, and not be afraid. So come out, bring the family, meet a clown and get a hug!”

The way I see it, our only obstacle to harmony and understanding concerns those bigoted few who will see this news and say “Clown lives matter? No, all lives matter!” What these fucking amateurs don’t understand is that clowns were persecuted way before these recent isolated incidents of them creeping people out in the forest. Disgusting films like It have painted these harmless people in a bad light, as have despicable phrases like “clowning around” and “ass-clown.”

Maybe he was just minding his own business, you BITCH!

I’m sick of this shit. All clowns have ever done for me is make cool balloon animals, so I have a proposition for all you bigoted pieces of CRUD out there: Go to a child’s birthday party, and make sure to leave your harmful misconceptions behind. Walk up to the clown after his show, embrace him (her/it/ze/zclown?), squeeze that red nose, feel that shaggy blue wig, and tell him that you are brothers. That’s how you make a difference in this country.

I hope to see you all in Tucson next week.

To listen to TFM’s writers talk clowns, subscribe to The Inside TFM Podcast on iTunes.

[via ABC 15 Arizona]

Image via Shutterstock

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WJ Cope

He's the real reason people say "No one likes you when you're 23."

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