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Blackout Kid Passes Out In Bar Closet, Wakes Up At 5:30 a.m., Wanders Around Super Confused On Security Camera

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I’m all for social alcoholism, but you’re not supposed to be at a bar at 5:30 a.m. At that hour, either drink at home or just go ahead and make the bar your home.

The other night one University of West Georgia rush went with the latter option. A tipster tells us said rushee and friends went to a local bar after a day filled with drinking and proceeded to then get even more hammered. At some point in the night, the blackout train hit him hard and he decided his bed was too far away.

The only salvation for a good night sleep? A mop-filled utility closet.

Now, let’s fast forward to 5:30 a.m. when Dr. Blackout wakes up dazed and confused. Thank Jesus there’s security footage:

At first glance, the kid looks morning drunk, but still composed. A quick jiggle of the locked door handle completely changes “composed” to “aw fuck my asssssssss.” He doesn’t know much, but he’s aware this should not be a one man party.

At this point, he’s now also set off the bar’s burglary alarm and the cops are closing in.

He’s basically shitting his pants in the second video trying to figure if he just accidentally time traveled to a time after humans, or if the bubonic plague wiped out the entire planet overnight.

The hand gesture says it all: “Okay, there were definitely people here five seconds ago and now there’s nobody. What the fuck?”

After calling a taxi and dipping out of the place, he finally made it back to the fraternity house, and all without a police record. And, since the kid didn’t steal or break anything, the bar owner found the whole ordeal hilarious and let him go free to sleep in someone else’s closet. Alls well that ends not terrible.

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El Taco

Either a war hero or war criminal depending on how you look at it

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