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Ball State Players Busted for Shoplifting

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From Deadspin:

Newsome was arrested early Monday morning and charged with possession of marijuana.

So? A football player gets busted for being in possession of funny pot cigarettes, big whoop, happens all the time. This next part though, not so much:

This will cause some locker room jokes. Ball State players Jonathan Newsome, Toney Williams tried to shoplift “male enhancement pills.



This has Shawshank sequel written all over it. I’m going to call it The Shawspank Redemption, here’s the plot:

After crawling to freedom through five hundred yards–that’s the length of five football fields–of smelling foulness I can’t even imagine, the two fugitives are finally captured, and are brought back to the very prison where they became such good friends.

Andy: What are you in here for?

Red: Shoplifting male enhancement pills, same as you.

Andy: Innocent?

Red: Only man guilty of having a ED in Shawskank.

We’ll even use Tiffani Amber Thiessen as the updated Rita Hayworth. I’m super stoked for this.

[via Deadspin]

Follow me on Twitter @JParksTFM

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