NEW TFM Videos Section

Watch thousands of hilarious videos from college campuses across the country.

Watch Now

Anti-American Social Justice Warrior Kuntzman At It Again, And This Time It’s Personal

======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====


This guy just doesn’t understand when to stop. First, he shoots an AR-15 and gets PTSD. Then, he says he isn’t a man because he can’t handle the media attention he was begging for. Now, he says that we need to retire patriotic anthem “God Bless America” during baseball games because he’s a bitchy atheist with a splitting headache from that time he shot a gun.

I can’t believe I’m quoting Gersh Kuntzman in this article, but you guys need to see how ludicrous this fool is. In his own words…

From NY Daily News:

“Now, don’t get me wrong: When Major League Baseball ordered all teams to play the patriotic jingle after 9/11, I didn’t immediately object. Standing with my fellow fans, as one, and singing a paean to our country provided catharsis, comfort and shared heartache. But it wasn’t long before heartache became headache. The Yankees still play it at every game, but most teams, like my beloved Mets, play “God Bless America” only on Sundays or holidays. But even that’s too much.”

This son of a bitch flip flops more than Hillary. I’m going to repeat this from my last column: where is your integrity? Where is the pride for your country that allows you to profess your ignorant bilge? And in case you haven’t noticed, big words don’t validate your work or lend you any credibility. You’re a schmuck.

Kuntzman continues, saying that he feels “outrage,” and that the practice of standing and removing your hat is fascist. Clearly, your parents were hippies and didn’t teach you anything about etiquette. Where I come from, standing and removing your hat is a sign of respect. We are standing and removing our hats in a deferential sentiment towards America, which is our home, as noted in the lyrics. This is especially true, as the song takes the form of a prayer, if you knew anything about etiquette, you would know to stand and remove your hat during a prayer.

Admittedly, Kuntzman stated one fact that is correct: Irving Berlin wrote “God Bless America” and then set it aside, but not because it was “maudlin and depressing,” but because it didn’t fit the fast pace of the comic musical revue for which it was was intended. Instead, like a phoenix from the ashes, the song rose to fame as an anthem for peace on the celebration of the first Veterans Day.

Then, Kuntzman poses us with some statistics. Namely:

“83.8% of people who described themselves as “very liberal” dislike the song.”

Of course they do, liberals have a problem with everything. When did you ever hear a liberal that wasn’t complaining? That’s the nature of liberals; they insist that nothing is good enough and that we should throw away every semblance of society and embrace the euphoric state of senseless anarchy. Kuntzman then follows up with:

“More than 88% of atheists dislike the song. (Quick aside: We atheists also hate having “In God we Trust” on the currency and in the courtrooms…)”

Of course atheists don’t like anything with the word God in it. This is a case of what scientists call “motivated reasoning.” If you’re an atheist and the word “God” offends you, get over yourself. Additionally, I feel like 88% of atheists would disagree with being lumped in the same category as Mr. Kuntzman.

Later in his article, Kuntzman lists a slew of people who are “offended” by the song. I think this is another classic case of taking quotes out of context. I’d like to put the point the rest; Americans are not being self-righteous, nor are we demonstrating any partiality on God’s behalf when we sing this song.

Think of this in its original context, released at the end of World War I, which was one of the deadliest conflicts in history, especially for America. We are asking for intercession on behalf of our country and the world at large. We are hoping for peace after years of war and millions of deaths.

That is why we sing this song, because the world is pretty fucked up, and a little bit of help from the Man upstairs isn’t going to hurt. When you think about everything that’s happening, there isn’t a better song for the here and now.

Fuck you, Gersh. I’m asking for your resignation.

[via NY Daily News]

Email this to a friend

Harhko, Esq.

Son of The Most Interesting Man in the World. Has a weakness for single malt scotch and older women.

39 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

Download Our App

Take TFM with you. Get

The Feed