The first teaser trailer for Christopher Nolan’s upcoming film Interstellar was released a few days ago and it’s one of the coolest collections of random shots that have pretty much nothing to do with the actual film it’s promoting that I’ve ever seen, thanks in large part to Matthew McConaughey’s eerie, awe-inspiring voiceover. I have no idea what the movie is even about, other than “outer space,” but I’m hoping at some point McConaughey’s character says something to the effect of, “That’s what I love about these astronaut girls in hyperbolic sleep chambers, man. I get older, they stay the same age.”
McConaughey’s narration is what really makes the trailer. It’s all about mankind having lost its drive to explore and pioneer things unknown, to accomplish the incredible, find something that already exists, take everything we want from it, and then make it way better, etc.
…these moments when we dared to aim higher, to break barriers, to reach for the stars, to make the unknown known. We count these moments as our proudest achievements. But we lost all that.
Have we lost all that, Astronaut Wooderson? Because one man from Canada has dared to aim higher. He has broken barriers and reached for the stars. His moment is, in fact, a damn proud achievement. What is this achievement, you ask? He invented a completely tits drinking game. It’s called Alcohockey, and it looks incredible.
Congratulations Canada, you’ve peaked. This is your crowning achievement, your greatest gift to the world, and we thank you for it. Any fraternity not putting this on their pledge project list right now is a brotherhood of FOOLS. Combining air hockey with beer pong is alcoholic ingenuity at its finest. I want one of these for my home. I’m motioning that TFM get one for its office. We’ll commandeer the intern’s workspace for it.
Well done, Canada. We always knew you would come through eventually.