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5 People I’d Allow to Punch Me in the Face

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Whether it’s not paying dues on time or starting fights at the bar that other people have to fight for me, I’ve done a lot of things that warrant a nice left hook to the face. If this ever happens, which may not since I’m shitty and somehow get out of bad situations, then I’d like it to be from one of these people:

Stone Cold

I feel like I’ve done enough in the past 2 years to merit one good fist to the face. I know this would end with reconstructive facial surgery, but I feel like Stone Cold has earned this. Also, I’m assuming that after knocking me the fuck out, someone would toss him a couple beers and he’d proceed to slam both of them like a fucking primitive piss drunk cock. After punching me in the face, I’d like to think that Stone Cold would get in the beer truck and tear ass back to the ranch.

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