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Imagine yourself at 18 years old, getting ready to enter the remarkable world of Greek life. I was the first person in my immediate family to go Greek, and had little-to-no-idea of what to expect when I stepped foot inside the frat house.
These experiences are shared by many first-time Greek members and probably even a few legacies. Before this website launched in 2010, all that kids like me knew about Greek life was from movies, and maybe a story or two from an older cousin, or from eavesdropping on a conversation between two college kids back home on break.
There were moments that blew my mind throughout my collegiate career and I am certain they still explode the brains of unknowing co-eds on campuses all across the country.
1. Your First Party
This is your introduction to life without parents, rules, common sense or sexual decency. Your first college party will likely come during your last few weeks of high school, or first few days on campus at a fraternity rush party.
Good luck trying to act like you’re used to seeing a guy do a three-story beer bong. It‘s okay, we‘ve all been there. In reality, your average night of drinking in high school probably consisted of you trying to find the best way to sneak a fifth of Evan Williams and a 12-pack of Milwaukee’s Best into your friend’s basement.
I’m also certain that you’ve never seen so many smoking hot girls with loose morals in one place at the same time, either. You‘ve been thrust into a world you could only have dreamed about. Welcome to paradise, you little fuck. Try and keep up. You’ll never want to leave.
2. When Pledgeship Begins
Candyland is over. No longer are the brothers going to pretend to be your best friend. Sorority girls will vanish out of thin air, so hopefully you got yours while you could. Your introduction to pledgeship may not “blow your mind,” but it will certainly suck every last ounce of optimism and excitement about college out of your brain.
You are a slave to an entire army of drunken adult-children, each day full of thankless work and endless degradation. Night in and night out, you’re going to be berated by inebriated drill sergeants, humiliated on a daily basis and treated like the pledge scum you are.
You knew the grace period wasn’t going to last forever, but you had no idea pledgeship was going to be this hellacious. Your mind is going to be tormented, body bent, and dignity torn to shreds. It’s only for a few months, but each day lasts forever and you will constantly ask yourself when it’ll all be over. Take it like a man.
3. Being Initiated
Each house is different, and obviously every ritual is sacred. What remains the same is that you are about to become a part of something centuries old. A small part of history. You’re accepted into the brotherhood after handling the anguish and despair of pledgeship. For most JI’s, this is probably the greatest sense of accomplishment you’ve ever experienced, unless you caught the game winning TD of the Texas state football championship, or beat leukemia as a kid. No matter, you hopefully came through on the other side with your pride, dignity and GPA intact.
4. Getting Your First Pledge Class
“Power resides only where men believe it resides.” That money quote from the acclaimed HBO Series Game of Thrones perfectly describes what it’s like when that first pledge class steps foot into your domain during your years as an upperclassman.
The power trip alone may drive some men to levels of insanity, as is displayed during nightly lineups. You have a platoon of bright-eyed servants at your command, ready to do your bidding at a moment’s notice. You’ve never had this much power in your life. You are the king; they are the peasants. Watch them suffer through the same hell you went through, pull through and become united as a pledge class. That’s what really blows your mind: watching a group of strangers become brothers through your own brand of fucked-up torture.
5. Your First Hookup With An Older Sorority Girl
Normally, a younger guy might be anxious to approach an older woman, but you’re in a frat. You can handle the challenge. Pull out your best white guy dance moves at a marriage party and charm her with your naivety. Play your cards right, and you’ll be taking shots back in your room. Eventually she’ll drag you back to your bed, taking control. This girl knows what she wants and is experienced in the ways of collegiate mating rituals. She’s an absolute tiger, a conjurer of exotic sexuality, pulling off moves you’ve only seen on Brazzers. She’s going to take you places you’ve never been before, and will make your high school girlfriend seem like a blowup doll. She makes love with a vigor and passion that might make you prejaculate before she even has a chance to rip your khakis off. She will set the bar for every sexual encounter for the rest of your life.