Now that summer is nearly upon us, I’ve chosen to dedicate this space to the guys that won’t be leaving to visit the family, slog through an internship, or study abroad or two. The ones that will be living in the chapter house all summer, staying drunk and merry, and maybe retaking a class here and there. Y’all are the real heroes, and should be recognized as such. After all, things can get monotonous during the dog days, and sometimes you need a bit of guidance on a few activities to try out when things get stale around the old stomping grounds. These are all things that’ll get you outside of the old chapter house, as the lack of pledges will probably leave it looking like post-Katrina New Orleans by June. Here are a few fun things to do that won’t clean out your checking account.
1. Minor League Baseball Game
Catching an MLB game is always a great time, but even the cheapest tickets can be upwards of fifty bones, and it’s tough to get a buzz when beer is seven bucks a pop. If you have a minor league team near you, it just might be worth checking out. You won’t get to see any Trouts, Harpers or Kershaws out there, but it’s mostly the same mildly entertaining action that you’ll see in the major league. These games usually feature tons of giveaways and promotions, and the stadiums will often host dollar beer nights. The low ticket prices make it a hell of a lot easier to justify getting an Uber home after three innings.
2. Master a Lawn Sport
If you and your fellow live-ins find yourselves getting beer guts from too many days of porch drinking, the summer can be a perfect time to get a crew together to play a sport. If you want something different from the usual pickup basketball or round of golf, grab a few guys for volleyball, badminton, bocce ball, etc. By the end of the summer, you can be all-stars at a sport no one plays, and you’ll be in relatively decent shape to boot.
3. Grill Up Some Exotic Shit
Due to a few hookups at a local meat plant, my brothers and I have been able to add some new choices to go along with our cookout staples. Some new favorites include alligator, ostrich, kangaroo, quail, and bison. Getting outside your comfort zone can be a great way to change up your barbecue game, and an otherwise boring day can easily get better with a few gator dogs.
4. Tour a Brewery
No matter what your neck of the woods may be, odds are there are at least a few good breweries within a couple miles. Hell, I’m saddled in the middle of Mormon country and there are still six or seven breweries within a ten mile radius. Going on a tour is a great opportunity to get a bit more familiar with the stuff you’ve been pounding on a daily basis, as well as try out new beers that you’ll be able to afford after college. All in all, it makes for a nice afternoon.
5. Ruin a Local Marathon
One man’s 5k or marathon is another man’s beer mile. I don’t know about you guys, but something gets on my fucking nerves when city streets get shut down for half a day so a bunch of overachievers can go for a run. However, you know what they say: If you can’t beat `em, join `em. By this, I mean fill up McDonald’s cups and squirt bottles with a beer or liquor of your choice and race a few friends along a stretch of the event that happens to be going on. If the summer heat and stomach full of booze doesn’t knock you out of the race, the shame of being surrounded by a bunch of athletic go-getters running for a charitable cause surely will..
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