Midterms are looming and students are heading to the liquor cabinet to take their minds off the stress brought on by the heaps of work that come around during this peak time in the semester. It’s no secret that booze is a great way to unwind and loosen up with your buddies after a long day, but there’s so much more support that drinking can provide you in your time of need. It can replace just about all of your standard study tips and tricks. Since you’d rather be drinking anyway, may as well just mix it in with your academic responsibilities like a freshman girl mixes Jack Daniels with Diet Coke, irresponsibly and with no sense of balance.
A staple of your fridge, this is really just for hydration and should be kept on hand at all times. Staying hydrated is key to keeping your mind sharp and alert. Additionally, it’s been proven that moving your body helps your memory. People who pace while giving a presentation is a great example of this. While you’re limited during exams, being confined to a chair and desk, you can use the motion of drinking a beverage to help you associate key ideas from your studies back to the exam. Just make sure the hand you hold your beer in is not your dominant hand used for writing. It’s science, people.
Forget coffee after 2 p.m. This is the stuff that will keep you going through the night. Also incredibly useful for studying in public places such as the library, this drink is simple and effective. Are you blinking? Careful. You might be getting sleepy, so have another drink. If you’re consuming these correctly, you should be accomplishing your work at double your normal speed, and at most require 2.5 hours of sleep to function. Who cares about your heart? Justify it to your parents that you’re just learning.
Woodford Reserve, Neat
Or really any fine, top-shelf liquor will work here, but it’s important that the drink is something you really enjoy. It’s important you love this drink, because it’s your motivation drink. Every time you finish a chapter, take a couple nips. Every time you get a practice question right, have some more. When you first open the book, treat yourself. This is the drink that keeps you going from one task to the next. It’s the carrot being dangled in front of you to keep your eyes forward and on track. You can step up the motivation game by taking it on the rocks. If you take too long to get the work done and reach your reward, it won’t taste quite as sweet because the ice will have watered it down. Tick, tock.
You’ve been doing the readings, you pushed through the all-nighters, and you had pledges quiz you on vocabulary while you practiced drinking beer with your non-dominant hand. Now it’s test day. You’ve got to wake your sorry ass up and get going. Just smelling coffee will get you going and tell your brain it’s time to start the day, and whiskey will keep the nerves down, but really what do you have to be nervous about? You put the most cutting edge study practices to good use and you are more than prepared for this test. That being said, it can’t hurt to put in a few more glances at your notes, and what better way to do it than over your morning coffee and whiskey while you pop an addy to put you in the zone?
Drink hard and study smart, kids..